Designated Read: And also abuse of reason
• And abuse of credulity, and ... It turns out Boise State shares our opinion regarding the severity of penalties directed its way for such heinous infractions as, among other tomfoolery, arranging team slumber parties during voluntary summer workouts to house incoming players. Remember this delightful revelation, back in the spring?
In most cases, incoming players slept on a couch or floor. The 40 violations involved $4,934 in impermissible benefits, ranging from $2.34 to $417 for each individual.
Competitive advantage, ahoy! So the school self-imposed sanctions, but the NCAA threw more scholarship reductions and practice time cuts its way, which Boise is understandably resisting, because, again, slumber parties.
• Not better: Jerry Sandusky proclaimed his innocence on national television last night, in a thoroughly creepy interview with Bob Costas. Joe Paterno's name is off the Big Ten trophy. Graham Spanier will be replaced as BCS presidential oversight committee chairman. More alleged Sandusky victims have reportedly come forward (although what is the point, exactly, of saying "close to 10"?).
• Fresh coaches, bought and sold: Tommy Tuberville gets the all-important rite of passage for middling coaches of middling teams, the vote of confidence from his administration. Peyton Manning reminds Ole Miss he doesn't appear to have coaching chops.
• Home for the ruptured: Tyler Bray has been cleared for practice at Tennessee. Keith Price may have to sit out when Washington plays Oregon State. The unnamed Miami football player carted away during practice for heat exhaustion is reportedly fine.
• Roster blotter: Connor Halliday: now Wazzu's starting quarterback. Miami safety Ray-Ray Armstrong: reinstated. Michigan safety Marvin Robinson: charged with home invasion. Georgia Tech linebacker Jeremiah Attaochu: suspended for a half. Iowa State wide receiver Albert Gary: suspended three games. Two Illinois redshirt freshmen: suspended for fighting.
• Quote of the day: "We don't want someone coming across our trademark on a porn site. God only knows what they'd come up with." -- Terry Robb, director of information technology at the University of Missouri-Columbia (read on to discover innovative new frontiers in rivalry trolling!)
• Tuesday whimsy: Here's another headline you don't see every day: "Police solve mystery of severed buffalo head found in Boulder yard." (Ralphie has been safely accounted for.) Michael McAdoo's lawsuit isn't going so well. Via Rock M Nation, read football commentary that's over a century old. And watch video from Tennessee's veterinary school of mascot Smokey being rehabbed back from an ACL tear, including footage of one very indignant cat in a life jacket.