Gone to Carolina (in his mind)
Longtime readers will know how we feel about mixing politics in with our football,* but if we're going to cover the shenanigans of grown-ass people going crazy over SEC football, it's only fair to extend our gaze to the ACC as well. From a Treasury Department investigation into employee misconduct comes this gem:
An employee at the Office of Foreign Assets Control, which administers international trade sanctions levied against other countries, reportedly used his badge and credentials to avoid arrest at a October 22, 2009 Florida State Seminoles vs University of North Carolina Tar Heels football game in Chapel Hill, North Carolina (North Carolina lost 30-27 after a second half rally by Florida State). He became angry when not allowed to enter the stadium while in possession of a prohibited alcoholic beverage and, after identifying himself to stadium security, became drunk and disorderly.
Have you considered, heartless stadium personnel, that he was perhaps there in order to levy some of those sanctions? And can you imagine if this game had taken place at Florida State? We can hear the outcry from UF and Miami fans now: "WE KEEP TELLING YOU TALLAHASSEE ISN'T REALLY PART OF FLORIDA."
*Spoiler alert: We do not care for it unless it is really, really funny. As such, please keep the comments below light and frothy and not at all serious, in the spirit of the offseason. Our ban-button finger is well-conditioned for fall. Thanks so much. [HT: Megan Carpentier, whose site we were visiting because of this story about a town in Alaska that has a cat for a mayor.]