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Designated Read: Woo Pig Wednesday?

Who are we to question alliteration like that? We haven't been to Arkansas since 2009, but will be celebrating this holiday for no other reason than liking the name:

Tennessee and UTSA, watch out. Bill Curry is expected to announce Wednesday that he will retire following the 2012 season, just shy of seeing Georgia State into the Sun Belt.

We would like to go ahead and fulfill that Steele prophecy, if it's not too much trouble. UCF's stated goal in appealing its bowl ban is to "get this over with," but is it winking? Bylaw Blogger thinks so.

• Mike Leach goes right to our heads. The first time we ever met the Dread Pirate, we spoke of nothing but sharks for 10 minutes. Here, he relates his own Shark Week tales. It turns out one should not chum waters in which one is currently standing!

• Condolences. Former Central Michigan standout Ontario Sneed has died at the age of 26, according to local news reports. Sneed was a top-10 all-time rusher and receiver for the Chippewas and had a name straight out of a Sherlock Holmes story. Our sincere best wishes to his family and the Central Michigan community.

• Injury report story hour. Michigan freshman defensive end Chris Wormley is probably lost for the season with a torn ACL ... whatever happened to Texas OT Josh Cochran in practice is apparently not serious ... and attend the tale of Florida quarterback Jeff Driskel, if you dare.

• Roster blotter. Michael Dyer will reportedly land at Prairie View ... Ray Ray Armstrong is bound for NAIA's Faulkner University ... here is visual evidence of Oregon's Colt Lylerla back at practice ... and we said this on Twitter, but by 2013 we have every confidence Texas will just be rotating quarterbacks every 15 minutes, with Mack Brown explaining this away by saying they're called quarterbacks for a reason.

• Tweet of the day, August Is Terrible Edition. We're working on projected conference rankings all week, so please keep in mind:

• Misc. Here's the Big East's official release on Mike Aresco ... Miami's linebackers get the McKayla treatment ... Matt Barkley is stoked to be one of SI's cover bros ... if CBS doesn't call its new studio team "From Zook To Nutts" we will file an FCC complaint ... and why are there not more stimulant-laced brunch drinks available on the open market?

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