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Designated Read: Move over, Baby Mangino

Baby Mangino, you had a hell of a run. You achieved internet glory and are surely a robust and take-no-prisoners schoolchild by now. We wish you all the best, and must now pass your mantle to another:

• No. 2 Oregon 43, Arizona State 21. Stewart Mandel took in last night's carnage in Tempe:

For exactly three plays Thursday, No. 2 Oregon looked mortal. On second down of the Ducks' first possession, the quarterback fumbled. One play later, Arizona State quarterback Taylor Kelly threw a 28-yard touchdown.

"I don't know if there can be a worst start," said Oregon defensive coordinator Nick Aliotti. "And then we decided that maybe, possibly we wanted to play today."

• SMU 72, Houston 42. Oh, just SMU scoring 31 points in a single quarter, that's all. This entire football season is beginning to fill us with a vague horror.

Schedule matters. Vanderbilt broke a date with Northwestern without so much as a phone call, the rakes! Northwestern announced this morning that the Wildcats will replace the Commodores on their schedule with Western Michigan. Vandy has also canceled a meeting with Ohio State, so let's all join in wishing the 'Dores the very best of luck against this murderers' row of non-con opponents. In other value-added news, Maryland and Wisconsin have scheduled a two-year home-and-home series for 2020 and 2021.

• Goods and services. Texas edition! Let Burnt Orange Nation instruct you in the meatly arts. Preferably while wearing this here T-shirt ... Jerry Kill graciously offers to fight his doubters ... savor some West Virginnyan pickin' and singin'.

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