Assorted Week 10 football contests that you get to watch and we, for the most part, do not. Enjoy?
• Games we will miss the most while participating in a wedding ceremony taking place in a state that is very far away from any of these games: In descending order: Oregon-USC (7:00 p.m. ET), Alabama-LSU (8:00) and Oklahoma State-Kansas State (8:00). Let our plight serve as a dire warning: Friends don't let friends go to art school and go out into the world thinking it's socially acceptable to plan November weddings.
• Team of the week that Maryland will either beat or embarrass or both with its 19th-string quarterback: Is it terribly foolish of us to like the Terps' chances against Georgia Tech? We'll find out at 12:30 in College Park. Maryland's defense has been its strength this season, and Tech's doesn't seem particularly inclined to stop teams that do have quarterbacks, so ...
• Most Americanest football contest of Week 10: Air Force and Army run the next leg of the Commander-in-Chief's Trophy race at noon.
• Saddest event we still technically have to call a football contest: Auburn and New Mexico State, with a combined record of 2-14, meet on the Plains at 12:30.
• Most promising undercard matchup: Don't sleep on Tulsa at Arkansas, despite the 12:21 kickoff that'll make for a pre-noon game on local time. Shields will be shaken. Oaths will be broken. Barns will be burned.
• Locavore ball: For those of you liking your football farm-to-fan style and desirous of keeping your tourism dollars in-state, our sommelier recommends: Western Michigan at Central Michigan (1:00), Akron at Kent State (2:00), Texas at Texas Tech (3:30) and a mid-afternoon Louisiana fight in the form of Ragin' Cajuns-Warhawks (4:00).
• Pointiest potential pointsplosion: Sleeper pick! Arizona at UCLA at 10:30. Let's see what RichRod's war machine can do in a race against a Bruins squad that's quietly 6-2 and putting up more than 33 points per game.
• Grisliest potential blowout: Baylor's Nick Florence leads the nation in total offense, captains the nation's No. 3 overall offense and plays for a 3-4 team thanks in large part to the Bears' uproariously porous defense. His opponent this week is a Kansas team that's also no great threat on defense and can't score. Decided schematic advantage: Bears. Kickoff's at 3:30. • Best nightcap: Several fine choices here, but we'll go with San Diego State at Boise State at 10:30 and see if we don't get a shakeup in the natural order of the Mountain West.