Pyschic Ape Correctly Predicts Super Bowl Winner, Signifies Doom for Mankind
Lost in all this "Super Bowl" hoopla was the real story of weekend, which is that Eli (of all names) an ape residing at the Hogle Zoo in Salt Lake City, predicted "without any hesitation" last week that the Seahawks would win the Super Bowl.
The Seahawks did indeed win, once again firmly establishing Eli as the foremost Super Bowl prognosticating primate in existence.
Not to be confused with Paul the World Cup oracle Octopus (RIP), Eli, who makes his picks by knocking over the papier mâché helmet representing the team of his choice, has guessed the correct Super Bowl winner every year since 2007.
Should we chalk this up to repeated lucky guesses, or are we finally on the verge of the Ape Revolution?
I, for one, accept our new ape overlords.[Time]