Tuesday February 4th, 2014

Some Light Reading

Richie Incognito and Jonathan Martin :: AP Richie Incognito and Jonathan Martin :: AP

The Big Lead has published over 1,000 text messages exchanged between former Dolphins teammates Richie Incognito and Jonathan Martin. The texts are definitely NSFW, so be careful who's looking over your shoulder while you read.

SI Swimsuit Relationship Update

Page Six reports that Derek Jeter and Hannah Davis have broken up because she is getting too famous. Not to be outdone, Anne V. saw her eight-month relationship with Mets pitcher Matt Harvey come to an end. In happier SI Swimsuit news, 2014 is the biggest year yet for new models, with 12 rookies debuting in the issue when it hits newsstands on Feb. 18. The first two -- Gigi Hadid and Sara Sampaio -- were unveiled yesterday on SwimDaily.

Nice Try


Michael Vick was simply trying to support a fellow quarterback by suggesting Russell Wilson may have been a better choice than Doug Baldwin for Super Bowl MVP. The only problem is linebacker Malcolm Smith was named MVP, not Baldwin.

Lovely Lady Of The Day

I'm quickly becoming a fan of Starz's Black Sails, due largely to Jessica Parker Kennedy. Then I saw her give an interview with Maxim in which she declared Charlie Hunnam (aka - Jax Teller) her celebrity crush and I knew she'd make a perfect LLOD.

More Bathroom News From Sochi

Last week, we discovered that athletes will implement the buddy system while using the toilet in Sochi. Canadian snowboarder Sebastien Toutant tweeted an interesting bathroom-related chart that demonstrates the proper use of the toilet. So if you had plans to PWS (pee while standing) or toilet fish, you had better think again.

One Way To Spend $500,000

Retired NHL star Bill Guerin spent $500K to build this sweet outdoor hockey rink outside his home in Sewickly, PA.

SI Vault Photo of the Day

Wes Unseld :: Peter Read Miller/SI Wes Unseld :: Peter Read Miller/SI

The Washington Wizards are above .500 for the first time since 2009 and for the first time in John Wall's career. It wasn't always so bad in Washington. In 1978, Wes Unseld led the Bullets to the the franchise's only championship with a victory over the Seattle SuperSonics. SI's John Papanek described the postgame celebration:

The scene was reminiscent of the one in the Bullets' dressing room at the Seattle Coliseum two nights earlier, afterWashington's 105-99 victory over the SuperSonics had made them only the third NBA team to win a seven-game championship series on the road. During their celebration, the Bullets soaked each other not with champagne but with Heineken. "Well, I've always said that we're the work-ethic team," said Coach Dick Motta, "so I guess beer is appropriate."

As the beer was spritzed around, the Bullets manifested their joy in different ways. Forward Bob Dandridge bounced between the low ceiling and the floor like a dribbling basketball, whooping "Hey! Whooo! Wheee! Yeah!" Guard Charles Johnson, who had helped clinch the championship with 19 points worth of unconscious shooting in Game 7, made like the cool, dispassionate pro. "I'm a pressure player," he said, sucking on a toothpick. "If my shot's got backspin. it's got a chance."

Odds and Ends

DeMarcus Cousins called Mike Dunleavy a clown after last night's Kings-Bulls game ... Joe Theisman thinks it's time for Peyton Manning to retire ... The Milwaukee Bucks are giving kids free tickets for February ...  It's one thing to rob a house, but to steal their cheese too ... Mario Balotelli has an amazing new haircut ... James Harden has been cloned ... A Saudi man lost 700 pounds, per order of the King ... Bubba Watson's one-year-old son has already played more golf in his life than I have. 

Ejection Of The Day

Joakim Noah loses it after being ejected during last night's Bulls-Kings game.

John Tortorella, Auto-Tuned

This song has been stuck in my head all morning.

You Don't See This Everyday

Blazers guard Nicolas Batum steals the ball from teammate LaMarcus Aldridge.

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