Let's keep this simple. You know you want a sculpture of yourself made out of bacon. I mean, why wouldn't you? All the great leaders in history were immortalized with sculptures, and you want to be a great leader, right?
So, really, entering Farmland Bacon Club's "Bacon or Bust" contest is a no-brainer. All you have to do is register with Farmland Bacon Club by June 15, and you'll be entered to win both a bacon sculpture in your likeness and a year's supply of free bacon.
Actually, you know what? Forget entering. The odds of you winning are pretty low, honestly. Plus, it's not like a year's supply of free bacon will be good for your figure. So don't register with Farmland Bacon Club -- and I'm not just saying that because you not entering means my chances of winning increase. Nope, not at all.
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