WHAT IS THIS WITCHCRAFT? The Three Little Pigs Nachos
WHO HATH WROUGHT THIS MONSTROSITY? Soldier Field, home of the Chicago Bears
WHAT COMPRISES SUCH A THING? The Three Little Pigs nachos are like regular nachos, but instead of tortilla chips, it’s got pork rinds smothered in melted pepperjack cheese and toppings. It’s perfect for people who love nachos but hate the defining feature of nachos.
WHY IS IT CALLED “THREE LITTLE PIGS”? There’s three kinds of pig meat in this delectable dish:
- Base of pork rinds
- Topped with pulled pork
- Gently sprinkled with bacon
DID YOU KNOW THAT STUDIES SHOW THAT PIGS HAVE THE SAME EMOTIONAL CAPACITY AS MOST HUMANS? Yeah, well, try not to think about it.
HOW MANY CALORIES IS IN ALL THAT MEAT? Around 800
SHOULDN’T I EAT SOME VEGETABLES? There are a few jalapeños on it. Jalapeños are vegetables.
HOW DO I BUY IT? Unfortunately, it went on sale last season and there’s no evidence that it’s still around, but if you tweet passionately at Aramark, maybe they’ll bring it back.
Concession Food Item Hall of Champions: