As we prepare for the beginning of a new MLB season, it seems worthwhile to remember that baseball is really weird. Absurdity is the inevitable result of a six-month season.
With that in mind, let's take a look at some of the most ludicrous moments of each team's 2014 season.
The Diamondbacks-Giants game on April 3 was delayed by a massive swarm of bees. Beads? Bees!
Catching a ball with a popcorn bucket is cool. Catching a ball that's headed right toward a little girl's face with a popcorn bucket is even cooler.
Adam Jones is a four-time Gold Glove winner but that doesn't mean he can't occasionally forget how to count to three. His gaffe here cost the Orioles a run, but he was able to laugh it off.
Ummm yea there's 3 outs per inning Mr. Jones. At least the man on first didn't advance. But I did feel like tripping myself. But I smiled.— 10 (@SimplyAJ10) July 21, 2014
Boston Red Sox
Adam Dunn isn't much of a base stealer, but Jake Peavy didn't take any chances. Peavy's pickoff must have inspired confidence in Dunn's running ability. He took off and stole a base five days later.
It's probably a good idea to speed the game up a little bit when the guy who's supposed to be keeping score dozes off in the fifth inning.
Chicago White Sox
Adam Dunn's final MLB season was one to remember. He even got some work as a mop-up reliever.
If you're wondering why MLB.com's Mark Sheldon was so upset his computer got busted by a foul ball, it isn't just because his expensive machine was ruined. No, Sheldon had just finished writing his game story and was about to file it to his editor.
Traditionally, baseball is played with one ball. During a game in August between the Indians and Reds, an errant ball from the bullpen made its way onto the field. David Murphy got confused and was caught straying from third base. Let's hope MLB doesn't adopt that rule change.
Steven from "near the airport" helped power the Rockies to a doubleheader sweep over the Reds.
He even got some credit from Rockies manager Walt Weiss in his post-game press conference. "Whoever that rally guy was up in the upper deck," Weiss said, "nice job."
Adrian Beltre has a thing about people touching his head, but he must really like Miguel Cabrera if he let him get away with it.
Mascots are generally pretty terrifying, but it's tough not to love the Astros' Orbit.
Kansas City Royals
You have to admire this kid's spirit. "Fall down once, get up twice," the old saying goes. He fell down twice and stood up three times.
Los Angeles Angels
Mike Trout is the best all-around player in baseball, but his lazy throw here cost the Angels a run. It certainly wasn't all his fault, but we have to pretend Trout is human.
Los Angeles Dodgers
The Dodgers were one of the best teams in the NL last year, but this play was so disastrous Vin Scully could only say, "Holy mackeral."
Henderson Alvarez is proof that bunting is harder than it seems. He nearly got hit in the face trying to let this pitch go by.
Striking out with a runner in scoring position is frustrating enough. Failing to adequately express your frustration is just embarrassing.
Relief pitchers like Ryan Pressly don't attempt many pickoffs. Now we see why.
New York Mets
When Bartolo Colon signed with the Mets after 11 seasons in the American League, everyone knew his at-bats would be an adventure. By June he was ripping doubles down the line, though.
New York Yankees
The Yankees are baseball's stodgiest franchise, but at least Shawn Kelley could bring a little levity to the Pinstripes.
Josh Reddick's walkup music is so sensual Sean Doolittle can't help but jam in the bullpen.
The Phillies should put this guy in the outfield. His knees can't be worse than Grady Sizemore's.
Pedro Alvarez had so much trouble making throws from third base that the Pirates moved him to first. Trying to throw a coverless baseball may have been the beginning of his unraveling.
San Diego Padres
Rymer Liriano appeared to be cruising into third base, and then... oh no! If only the Padres could blame their league-worst offense on bad luck.
San Francisco Giants
Hunter Pence's style of play is certainly unorthodox. Literally throwing the bat at the ball might be taking things a bit too far.
From the way he wears his hat, it should be clear Fernando Rodney doesn't care much for uniforms.
St. Louis Cardinals
Even baseball players caught World Cup fever last summer. At his size, Adam Wainwright might make a pretty good goalkeeper.
Tampa Bay Rays
Yadier Molina could tell his brother Jose was a bit hungry, so he was kind enough to send him a snack.
This is one of the many reasons we'll miss Yu Darvish while he recovers from Tommy John surgery. How many other pitchers can strike a guy out with a 59 mph pitch?
Toronto Blue Jays
Thankfully, MLB's new pace of play rules weren't in effect last season. Melky Cabrera could have gotten fined for stepping out of the box to cower in fear.
Bryce Harper certainly has the strength to break a bat over his leg, but his technique is all wrong. What was he so angry about? Maybe he was just mad he couldn't grow a beard like this guy's.