After striking out on Tom Brady, Ben Roethlisberger and Mike Ditka, the Republican National Convention finally scored its sports celebrity speaker: Tim Tebow.
That’s right, the NFL flameout and Heisman winner will be giving a speech at the RNC, which has become a no-fly zone for some Republicans who refuse to support Donald Trump.
Tebow has said in the past he could see himself pursuing a future in politics, and this looks like his first foray into that world. What might Tebow talk about during the convention? Here’s what we think he could say:
- “We need to keep tax rates as low as my completion rate.”
- “I know how you guys feel. I also lost my job during the Obama administration.”
- “Quarterback lives matter.”
- “I only go left when I throw footballs.”
- “I’d say we need to keep our borders secure but I’m still hoping for a shot in the CFL.”
- “I soured on trade deals after I ended up on the Jets.”
- “I know a thing or two about winning in Florida. You’re on your own in New York, though.”
- “At least I lasted longer than Manziel.”
- “I know you guys are crazy about LeBron, but always remember Jesus Christ is the real savior.”
- “We will end the War on Christmas.”