Brett Favre: AP
On the flip side, we have the Cardinals, a gut-wrenching, stomach-churning team to watch in real-world football but a highly dependable source of fantasy amusement. Yes, Kurt Warner threw some passes (turned interceptions) that defied logic. And yes, Edgerrin James broke character to score two easy rushing touchdowns. But at the end of the day, Warner still had his typical monster numbers (472 passing yards, 2 TDs), Larry Fitzgerald and Anquan Boldin (18 catches, 242 yards and 1 TD) were their usual Hall of Fame-caliber selves and rookie tailback Tim Hightower vultured yet another short-yardage TD from Edge. Throw in Steve Breaston's nine-catch, 122-yard output as the third receiver ... and it's easy to see why the Cardinals are the best garbage-time team in the league. (Note: Here's hoping Boldin is doing well after that nasty helmet-to-helmet collision in the fourth quarter).
Kansas City 33, Denver 19
As for the Broncos offense, starring Jay Cutler (361 passing yards, 1 TD), Brandon Marshall (7 catches, 77 yards, 1 spectacular TD) and Eddie Royal (104 receiving yards), the 19-point output may end up being the team's season-low. If that's the case, better stock up on secondary performers like Michael Pittman (81 total yards), Selvin Young (45 yards), tight end Tony Scheffler, receiver Brandon Stokley (7 catches, 80 yards) and especially kicker Matt Prater, who nailed four field goals Sunday -- including a 56-yarder.
San Diego 28, Oakland 18
New Orleans 31, San Francisco 17
Regarding the inconsistent 49ers, let Sunday's clunker be a lesson to fantasy owners everywhere: Always discount a team's performance against the Lions (San Fran's Week 3 opponent) -- or, at the very least, never expect a results carryover (we're talking to you, J.T. O'Sullivan). Frank Gore looked OK, totaling 113 yards, but he was obviously saving himself for a 5-TD day against the Patriots next week ... while running the Single-Wing T -- as an homage to Ronnie Brown and the Dolphins.
Chris Johnson: Doug Benc/Getty Images
Washington 26, Dallas 24
Jacksonville 30, Houston 27 (OT)
Carolina 24, Atlanta 9
Ryan Grant: Gregory Shamus/Getty Images
The other day, I offered specific predictions for Week 4 -- some pure gold and others that flopped worse than The Brady Bunch Variety Hour, the short-lived skitapalooza that featured the original Brady Nine ("Oliver" doesn't count), except for Eve Plumb. Here's a rundown of things so far:
QB Locks For 275 Yards and/or 3 TDs
1. Carson Palmer (late scratch -- no penalty)
2. Derek Anderson (138 yards, 1 TD -- wayyyyy off!)
3. Drew Brees (363 yards, 3 TDs -- correct!)
4. J.T. O'Sullivan (257 yards, 1 TD -- incorrect)
5. Tony Romo (300 yards, 3 TDs -- correct!)
6. Ben Roethlisberger (to be determined on Monday)
RB Locks For 120 Yards and/or 2 TDs
1. Clinton Portis (135 total yards -- correct!)
2. LaDainian Tomlinson (115 total yards, 2 TDs -- correct!)
3. Steven Jackson (188 total yards, 1 TD -- correct!)
4. Chris Johnson (75 total yards, 2 TDs -- correct!)
5. Thomas Jones (69 total yards -- incorrect)
6. Frank Gore (113 total yards, 0 TDs -- incorrect)
7. Reggie Bush (38 total yards -- wayyyyy off!)
8. Jonathan Stewart (52 total yards, 1 TD -- incorrect)
9. Maurice Jones-Drew (49 total yards -- incorrect)
If you're operating a winless fantasy team, one that's already in serious jeopardy of missing the playoffs (Weeks 14-16), the time has come to explore any and all trades with other teams. Oh sure, you can afford to be a little stubborn if eight teams qualify for the postseason. But, for the most part, it's time to put on your Creative Trading Hat and cultivate a 2-for-1 swap (Calvin Johnson? Clinton Portis?), a 3-for-1 swap (Adrian Peterson? Joseph Addai? Ronnie Brown?) or groundbreaking 4-for-1 swap (Marion Barber? Brian Westbrook? Brandon Marshall in PPRs?).