Your guide to the weekend -- SIOC style.

NCAA Men's Division III Final Four, Salem, Va., 5 p.m.

Bored with the trivial nature of the NCAA tournament's first two rounds? Check out some games that really matter. Defending champion Amherst battles Ursinus in the first matchup; Wash U. takes on #1 Hope College in the second game. The two winners play for the title on Saturday afternoon (4 pm, CSTV).

PINK 2008, University of Louisville, 7 p.m.

The tournament selection committee didn't do Louisville students any favors -- the team's 9:40 tip-off against Boise State still seems light years away. The good news is students can kill some time at PINK, the school's amateur drag and variety show. Check out the best drag kings and queens before they turn pro.

NCAA Women's Swimming Championships, Ohio State

Arizona came into the competition ranked #1 in the nation, and so far all they've done is live up to that ranking. On Thursday the team broke an NCAA record in the 200m freestyle relay en route to taking the day-one lead. Over the next 48 hours Auburn and Cal with try to catch them.

7th Annual Bouldering Competition, Washington State, 9 a.m.

Finally, a competition for people who find climbing with the safety of a rope too much of a nuisance. The action won't compare to the great Pierre Allain scaling rocks in Fontainebleau, but the winners will get prizes.

From Afghanistan to the Miss America Pageant, BYU, 10 a.m.

After serving in Afghanistan for 18 months Jill Stevens did what any combat medic with five medals would do. She became Miss Utah and semi-finalist in the Miss America competition. On Saturday she shares her story with BYU students. Watch out for another outlandish exit.

NCAA Wrestling Championships, St. Louis, Mo., 7:30 p.m.

The top ranked Iowa Hawkeye's -- who are looking for their first title in eight years -- led the team competition after the first day. During Saturday's final session they'll have to hold off Nebraska, Central Michigan, Iowa State, and defending champion Minnesota.

Real Sports With Bryant Gumbel, HBO, 3 pm.

The episode (which first aired two weeks ago) features an interview with Tennessee coach Bruce Pearl. I guarantee you will be amused by at least one thing he says.

Henry Rollins at the McDonald Theater, Eugene, Ore., 8 p.m.

The punk rock/spoken word/talk show host extraordinaire brings his "Provoked" spoken word tour to the University of Oregon's local theater. Rollins' displeasure with the current state of affairs in our country could make last month's Clinton-Obama debate look like a Bush State of the Union Address.

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