1 Barry Bonds

Wait, Bonds might have lied about taking steroids? Wow, call us naïve, but we did not see that one coming.

2 Oscar De La Hoya

Remember those pictures of De La Hoya dressed in drag with a stripper in some dingy hotel room? Well, there's finally a lawsuit. Yeah, the stripper is suing De La Hoya for defamation. As Don King would say, "Only in America."

3 Tom Brady

Yes, him again. Listen, as long as he's throwing five touchdowns a game and dating Gisele he's going to be near the top of this list. It's like an MVP vote for A-Rod, you hate to do it but you have no choice.

4 Alex Rodriguez

Speaking of A-Rod, the N.Y. media painted a picture of him "crawling" back to the Yankees and "begging" for forgiveness after he opted out of his contract. Say what you will about him, but it's hard to use the words "crawling" and "begging" to describe a guy who got a raise and inked a $275 million deal.

5 Matt Damon

We can live with the success of the Red Sox, Pats and Celtics, but when did N.E. become the hot bed for sex symbols? Not only did Boston sports fanatic Damon win People's "Sexiest Man Alive" award, he says Brady should have won it. "Matt and I always argue about who's hotter," said Brady

6 Mike Tyson

A story about Tyson being arrested and sent to jail would normally be filed under the "been there, done that" department, that was until we discovered this gem. Tyson will be incarcerated in Tent City, Maricopa County's infamous jail near a dog pound and trash dump and will wear the standard-issue pink underwear and black-and-white striped uniform.

7 Lil' Romeo

Our favorite "lil'" rapper staged a modest press conference at a Beverly Hills hotel this week and invited the paparazzi (you know TMZ is all over college basketball recruiting) to announce he's going to attend USC next year. Thankfully, he's getting a full-ride scholarship. You know, because we were kind of worried he and Master P. wouldn't be able to afford college.

8 Ines Sainz

All this talk about America's Sexiest Sportscaster got us to thinking: Who's the sexiest sportscaster on the planet? Our vote would likely go to our lovely friend from TV Azteca in Mexico who channels her inner Tila Tequila before dressing for "work.".

9 Lakers

Stop the presses, the Lakers finally make a trade! Let's see here, they ship Brian Cook and Maurice Evans to Orlando for Trevor Ariza. Yeah, that's going to appease Kobe for about three seconds. One...two...three, OK, he still wants to be traded.

10 Michael Jordan

The much anticipated Air Jordan XX3s won't drop until February but sneaker heads on the 'net think they've copped a sneak peak at what they will look like. Yikes. We can only hope that these are fake, because if they're not, our favorite kicks have officially jumped the free-throw line.

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