Tuesday October 1st, 2013

Clippers center DeAndre Jordan sounds his barbaric yawp over the rooftops of the world. (Andrew D. Bernstein/NBAE via Getty Images) Clippers center DeAndre Jordan sounds his barbaric yawp over the rooftops of the world. (Andrew D. Bernstein/NBAE via Getty Images)

Media Day is one of the weirdest occasions on the NBA calendar, bringing eager athletes and media types together before the wear and narratives of the season begin to take their toll. What results is a day worth cataloguing, as rarely are NBA players more playful or candid. Here's a sampling of Media Day snippets from Monday's festivities.

• Monta Ellis defends his shot selection by relying on the safety of the crowd:


... and then offers an explanation that comes off as a bit ominous:


• Never was a story of more woe, than this of Kevin Seraphin and ... the snake that escaped its cage and is slithering loose somewhere in Washington, D.C..

• Choice hair products are important!:


• Remember this day, for it marks Samuel Dalembert's first tweet in THE HISTORY OF TWITTER:


• Please begin drafting your Rajon Rondo-Brad Stevens buddy cop movie scripts:


• One Grizzly (who, in his defense, was rated a mere 61) was none too pleased with his individual player rating in NBA 2K14:


Zach Randolph, for the record, is rated an 83.

Marc Gasol, posing like this because Media Day is a gift. (Photo by Joe Murphy/NBAE via Getty Images) Marc Gasol, posing like this because Media Day is a gift. (Photo by Joe Murphy/NBAE via Getty Images)

• Hurry now and join the Cult of Kawhi Leonard. Space is filling quickly.



• I'm delighted that Suns forward Channing Frye is again in a position to take jabs from his head coach rather than suffer through a life-threatening heart ailment.


• Brandon Rush -- who was traded from Golden State to Utah to clear cap room for Andre Iguodala -- doesn't mince words:


• Kendall Marshall is the hero Gotham deserves.

• A blessing to us all: LeBron James intends to table all free agency discussion until the end of Miami's season. Such is an act of mercy as far as I'm concerned.

Lessons of Media Day: New Orleans' may start three perimeter players of roughly the same height.(Layne Murdoch/NBAE via Getty Images) Lessons of Media Day: New Orleans may start three perimeter players of roughly the same height. (Layne Murdoch/NBAE via Getty Images)

• As is the case with many things that pro athletes do to keep themselves and their games in shape during the offseason, this sounds a bit exhausting:


• Goran Dragic already has his Halloween game on-point:


• The wisdom of Timberwolves center Nikola Pekovic:


• Robin Lopez is ready, should the NBA deign the Blazers as one of the teams to embroider nicknames on the backs of their jerseys for select games this season:


• Dirk Nowitzki, ladies and gentlemen.



Get excited, Laker fans. (Andrew D. Bernstein/NBAE via Getty Images) Get excited, Lakers fans. (Andrew D. Bernstein/NBAE via Getty Images)

• Rudy Gay takes part in the long-standing tradition of adding ridiculous amounts of "pure muscle," while also concocting a fantastic and unintentional play on the name of Toronto's former general manager, Bryan Colangelo:


• Important Alexey Shved hairstyle update:


• The night that Rajon Rondo's phone detonated:


• This season will bring the return of Corey Brewer to Minnesota, who didn't quite grasp the Timberwolves' baffling choice of offensive system during his last stint with the T'wolves:


• A man can dream:


• And a fitting finale, courtesy of new Knick Metta World Peace: https://twitter.com/HerringWSJ/status/384713752966615040

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