The updated Power Rankings arrive on Wednesday. But first, the Sour Rankings take a spin through the worst of the past week in the NFL …
Honorable mention: Only a truly ridiculous college football play can crack the Sour Rankings. Congrats, Cal!
Still, it's just the second-worst fake punt of the season. Arkansas State has the lead with its "fainting goat" play.
10. Jimmy Fallon's head: A running segment on The Tonight Show With Jimmy Fallon sees the host hand out "Superlatives," fake awards "like the ones in high school yearbooks" -- in this week's edition, for example, the Colts' Montori Hughes was named "Most Likely To Be The Human Version of Grumpy Cat."
And Fallon took notice of the unusual tribute:
9.No touching!: It is a penalty for a defender to line up directly over the long snapper on a kick, so we've seen on many occasions an official try to move a player out of illegal position before the snap.
Philadelphia's Bennie Logan was having none of it Sunday.
8. "I don't know what to do with my hands. What do I normally do with my hands?": This Bears fan had no idea how to react to a Jay Cutler interception. Either that or he was partially frozen. (GIF via @_MarcusD_)
7. Chase Coffman's clothesline: Technically, this happened two Sundays ago. But most people did not get to see it until FOX's Jay Glazer showed the video during his network's pregame show Sunday.
Coffman was fined $30,000 for the incident. According to the Baltimore Sun, the coach he laid out is Tony Coaxum an assistant on special teams ... and a former coach and player at Army.
6. Soldier Field's timekeeping: "Clocks here are bulls---."
Minnesota head coach Mike Zimmer said those words after his team failed to execute a critical two-minute drive without the benefit of any visible timekeeping system. Even the CBS announcers were mostly in the dark -- right before Teddy Bridgewater's game-clinching interception, an estimate put the game clock at one minute; right after, there were "a few seconds" remaining.
The clocks were touch and go all day, with multiple malfunctions occurring in the second half.
"The two in the end zone were wrong all day," Zimmer said. "The one across on the 50-yard line was accurate, so we had to go from one back to the other one. And then they shut that one off for awhile. Then they put it back on for awhile. Then they put the ones in the end zones on for awhile. It was musical clocks."
5. Sad Browns fans: Even with Sunday's disappointing home loss to the Texans, the Browns still sit at 6-4 and in the thick of the AFC North race. Still, that setback had to feel all too familiar for the long-suffering fan base.
The Big Lead even turned that screengrab into a fake "Les Miserables" movie poster.
Fair. Yet another Washington season has faded away, and the home fans let the players know how they feel by booing almost constantly on Sunday. (At least, when they weren't chanting for Colt McCoy to replace Robert Griffin III.)
Speaking of RGIII, he's taking some heat for a postgame quote that was pulled a bit out of context. This is the part that most people have seen: "If you want to look at the good teams in this league and the great quarterbacks, the Aaron Rodgers or Peyton Mannings, those guys don’t play well if their guys don’t play well."
Taken alone, it sounds like Griffin calling out his teammates. The rest of the comment included, "It takes 11 men. It doesn’t just take one guy and that is proven. ... We need everybody. I need every single guy in that locker room and I know they are looking at me and saying the same thing. I’m going to be there for them, I promise that. I give it to them every day. I am not going to quit on them. I need them to do the same and I believe they will."
3. A Chiefs fan haunting your nightmares: Fair warning that this cannot be unseen ...
Tackle-eligible touchdowns are the bee's knees.
1. That mean ol' Saints fan: After Bengals tight end Jermaine Gresham scored a touchdown Sunday, he picked out a Cincinnati fan in the crowd and tried to toss her the football as a souvenir. Instead, we got the fan interception heard 'round the world.
Eventually, the Saints provided the Bengals fan with her own football -- that Saints fan in the front row never relented to her pleads.
"He should be ashamed of himself," Gresham told the Associated Press. Later, he added this:
All's well that ends well.