Tuesday September 13th, 2011

The Rams came up short in Week 1 against the Eagles, losing 31-13. But don't blame the St. Louis fans, who sold out the Edward Jones Dome and, presumably, followed all the team's "Ram Rules."

What are Ram Rules? Glad you asked:

Cliff's Notes version, for those unwilling or unable to watch, is that there are five "Ram Rules," two of which involve shouting things in unison -- "Sack!" and "First down!" -- at the end of certain plays.

The other rules range from the obvious (be quiet when the Rams are on offense calling plays) to the even more obvious (cheer wildly when the opposition faces a third down) to the ... uh ... awesomeness of '80s movies (slow clap before kickoffs).

That last one has to be the best. I like the idea of not doing what everyone else does before kickoffs -- the drawn-out "Ohhhhhhhhhhhhhh" -- and I love that this particular Ram Rule comes from a middle-aged woman with rams horns apparently growing right out of her head telling us, "Let's slow clap it out."

I assume that moment is accompanied by this clip:

I'd also accept the slow clap scene from the end of "Cool Runnings," and, for slightly less points -- or more points, I'm not sure how this scoring system works -- the Winona Ryder hallway slow clap from "Lucas."

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