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Sour Rankings: '09 QB draft class, Philip Rivers' kick headline Week 3 duds

Josh Freeman is one of several QBs drafted in 2009 that has struggled in the NFL. Josh Freeman is one of several QBs drafted in 2009 who have struggled in the NFL. (Jeff Zelevansky/Getty Images)

You’ve seen (and likely disagreed with) the Week 3 Power Rankings. Now the Sour Rankings take a spin through the worst of the past week in the NFL …

10. Cardinals' linebackers: Two days, three linebackers out for the season. That's the spate of misfortune that befell the Cardinals' defense this week. Rookie Alex Okafor was the latest victim, joining Sam Acho and Lorenzo Alexander on the sideline for the remainder of 2013.

9. Dick Vitale's latest analogy: Texans running back Arian Foster admitted in a recent documentary to accepting money while at the University of Tennessee. The boisterous Vitale reacted on Twitter thusly: "When they put their hand out like a prostitute & take it they don't say a word - moaning yrs later = SAD!"

As you might expect, he apologized for that comment after being bombarded with complaints about it:

8. Lawrence Taylor vs. Boomer Esiason: For whatever reason, Showtime reached out to Boomer Esiason for its recent film on Lawrence Taylor (LT: The Life & Times), despite longstanding hostilities between the two former players. Taylor was less than amused with that decision:

"We can’t stand each other, he don’t know a f*** about me. What the hell’s he doing on it? ... First of all, Boomer’s a d***head. Hey, listen. I remember when he was there running the streets, screwing all kind of hoes. Don’t give me that holier than thou s***. ... He’s still talking about me. I ain’t talking about him.”

7. Oakland's reported new mascot: Mascots are pretty goofy in general (most live dogs, buffalo, eagles or tigers excluded. Also that Western Kentucky red blobby thing.) So how bad could the Raiders' new mascot really be ...

Oh.

6. Nate Burleson and the importance of priorities: Lions wide receiver Nate Burleson is one of those guys whom everyone likes -- he's well-respected in the locker room, deals with the media well and spent his most recent offseason working on the NFL Network. So it's certainly a shame that Burleson has had a second straight season interrupted by a serious injury.

But the way that injury occurred ... well ...

Burleson was driving home early Tuesday morning when a pizza slid off his passenger seat, distracting him and causing him to slam his car into a median on the highway. Burleson broke his arm in the crash and was scheduled for surgery Wednesday. Next time, just let the pizza go, Nate.

5. Jacoby Jones and Sweet Pea: First, there was the Vikings' "Love Boat". Now, the Ravens have their "Party Bus." Wide receiver Jacoby Jones reportedly suffered an injury early Monday morning when a stripper named "Sweet Pea" smashed a champagne bottle over his head. The incident occurred as Jones celebrated teammate Bryant McKinnie's birthday aboard a bus in Washington D.C.

"Not very impressed, personally, with the report. It’s not something we want to be known for," Ravens head coach John Harbaugh said Monday.

4. That picture of Rashad Johnson's finger: Going to make you click on the link to this one, rather than simply dropping it in here, in case you want to keep any food down today. Johnson, a safety for the Cardinals, lost the top of his right middle finger during Sunday's game against the Saints ... and only noticed when he took his glove off and found the amputated portion inside.

3. The franchise tag curse: Players generally hate receiving the franchise tag because of the inherent risk of one-year contracts. Case in point: Of the eight guys to receive the tag in March, three are now done for the season.

The Cowboys' Anthony Spencer was the latest -- he needs knee surgery, which will sideline him until at least January. Previously, Chicago's DT Henry Melton dropped on Sunday night with a torn ACL. And Denver's Ryan Clady, who at least had the benefit of signing a long-term contract before his tag kicked in, is done until 2014 due to a foot injury. Buffalo's Jairus Byrd also has yet to play this regular season because of a foot issue of his own.

2. San Diego's "The band is on the field!" attempt: You can't do that, Philip Rivers ...

That's how the Chargers' attempt at a miracle victory ended Sunday, after the Titans wrestled the lead from San Diego late. The Chargers actually progressed to about the Tennessee 30-yard-line, with Rivers completing a pass to Danny Woodhead. They then backtracked approximately 40 yards, a trip that ended when Rivers booted the ball across the field for the Titans to recover.

1. The 2009 QB class (excluding Matthew Stafford): Eleven quarterbacks were selected in the 2009 draft. With news of Josh Freeman losing his starting job in Tampa Bay, and with Mark Sanchez ceding his spot to Geno Smith, No. 1 overall pick Matthew Stafford is the lone '09 QB still standing.

The other quarterbacks taken that year: Curtis Painter, Stephen McGee, Pat White, Rhett Bomar, Nate Davis, Tom Brandstater, Mike Teel and Keith Null. Only Painter currently has a gig on an active NFL roster.

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