Being a non-rhyming post title* concerning Tribble Reese

Friday September 16th, 2011

*Only because I don't speak Star Trek:

There are some Clemson types none too pleased with the presence of Tribble “third-string quarterback who attempted all of 11 career passes” Reese overshadowing military appreciation day at Week 2′s home stand against Wofford. Tribble, it seems, has parlayed his time as a reasonably competent athlete at the collegiate level into a losing bid on CMT's Bachelorette knockoff, and subsequently wrangled his own show out of the experience -- one in which, paired with 20 ladies attempting to mate with him on camera and secure their own futures as motivational speakers at Curves gyms around the country, he cannot lose. Tribble and his dizzying array of floozies were featured at the head of Clemson's Tiger Walk, and earlier this week, offended parties spilled forth their displeasure with blistering elegance:

Since graduation, he has become, in the words of his Web site, “a television personality, model and bartender extraordinaire,” with a résumé that stems from appearances in “College Football – Self” to the skill of driving both stick shift and automatic transmissions. [...]  Clemson officials surely thought that the CMT cameras would capture the football program in a positive light, but I don’t think they considered the negative publicity this has spawned. Instead of having a decorated military veteran or wounded warrior lead Tiger Walk, they chose Reese and the cast of a second-rate reality show.

SICK COTILLION BURN. No, but seriously, "second-rate" is putting it kindly, and Tribble Reese’s presence in this capacity is gross and unnecessary. Would that he’d been photographed next to some visiting soldiers so all present could see just how silly he looks in comparison. (Recall that Clemson operated as a military school until the mid-20th century, and wonder whose desk this had to clear for it to even happen in the first place.) The outcry rose to such levels that an official apology was issued, which reads, in part:

The Clemson Athletic Department apologizes to anyone in the Clemson family who was offended by people connected with a CMT program who walked among our football coaches and players during Tiger Walk prior to the Wofford game.
Savor the implication there that the mere presence of would-be CMT starlets was enough to offend on its own merit. In an unfortunate era where the presence or absence of a flag pin on a politician's lapel can send cable and talk radio tongues into hysterical spirals for days on end, it might be understandable to dismiss the incident as political correctness exacerbated by a close scrape with an FCS team, but after watching about six minutes of footage from the show in question, I feel their reaction has been entirely correct. Trash is trash, and any proper Southern school worth its pearls and polos ought to be vigilant and diligent in disassociating from such tackiness.

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