Designated Read: I beheld five pale horses

Wednesday September 28th, 2011

No, but like, genetically engineered mutant pale horses that have teeth on their hooves. This article is coming up in the next issue of SI, but you need to see it now, for its flawless headline victory and for the belligerence of Bret Bielema and for the oh hell, just read this:

The key to this blue-collar slugfest will be which team controls the line of scrimmage. All five starters on the Wisconsin O-line -- left tackle Ricky Wagner, left guard Travis Frederick, Peter Konz, right guard Kevin Zeitler and right tackle Josh Oglesby (who didn't play in last Saturday's 59-10 destruction of South Dakota and was replaced by Rob Havenstein) -- grew up in the Badger State. Collectively they are the third-largest unit in the nation, averaging 322 pounds. Only two NFL teams, Cincinnati and San Diego, have more heft up front than Wisconsin.

We got us a game this weekend, is the point.

Damn good Dawg does not begin to cover it. When he's not wrecking shop against my alma mater, Bacarri Rambo is one of my absolute favorite players to watch. Rambo recorded two interceptions and a broken pass against Ole Miss this weekend, a performance fueled by heartbreaking motivation: The game, as it turns out, fell squarely between the Thursday death of and Monday funeral for Rambo's unborn son.

“It was very emotional, a tough time for me,” said Rambo, who was named National Defensive Back of the Week by the College Football Performance Award. “I just said a little prayer every time before I went on the field. And I could hear his voice say, ‘I’m watching you, Daddy. Go Daddy. Make me proud.’ It just motivated me.”

They might not feel like much right now, but if you're a thinking or praying type, please join me in sending thoughts and prayers of support to Rambo, his family and the Georgia football community.

Not know nothin', not nohow. Lane Kiffin disavows any knowledge of Willie Mack Garza's money-wiring shenanigans.

Is "because these sanctions are somehow stupider than the infractions, which is REALLY STUPID" a valid legal argument? Boise State is appealing the most ridiculous NCAA decision of 2011, which is a designation of some distinction.

Quote of the day. "The Pac-12 has reprimanded Matt Barkley for calling Vontaze Burfict a dirty player. Guess it will keep reprimanding Burfict 15 yards at a time." -- Stewart Mandel

Giveth, taketh. Kenny Stills' head is better, although he might not let on if it wasn't. Vanderbilt's extremely Vanderbiltly-named Tristan Strong will miss the remainder of the season with an unspecified leg injury (reportedly a torn ACL).

Roster dance! Wonders never cease: target="_blank">Trick-shot wonder Johnny McEntee is gonna start for UConn. Wednesday whimsy. See Mike Gundy dance like a mere man of 39. Guess from which team's tailgate this video of a toddler with a beer funnel originated, and it won't take you long. There are several ... interesting options on the table for the Nebraska-Iowa trophy. A tiny violin plays for a tiny rushing back. Kinda sad that it's too late now to give up blogging, go work for the Orange Bowl, and get compensated like this. I fully support the adoption of these helmets and gloves at Tennessee. And as an Eleven Warriors commenter points out, it's THE Ohio State University, you monsters.

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