The Dean's List

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Arizona and Texas Tech were in the running for the Dean's List's team of the week. After all, both schools knocked off top five teams. But they also both did it by injuring the opposing team's quarterback, although Dennis Dixon really injured himself, and the Dean's List don't like that. So we're gong to give this honor to Harvard for beating Yale 37-6 in a battle of the Ivy League's two undefeated teams. In the school's 124th matchup, Harvard held Yale's star running back Mike McLeod, who came in averaging 174 yards per game, to a meager 50 yards en route to the Crimson's third Ivy League title in seven seasons. No word yet on how the champagne and caviar tasted in the parking lot, but there was one report of a Yale fan who tried to steal a Harvard flag and received a healthy beating by the Crimson cheerleading squad.

Listen, Tim Tebow should permanently be on the Dean's List. (Except for that game against Kentucky, when he should have just been on the bench.) This week, after a 338 yard, three-touchdown performance, he became the first player in NCAA history to rush for 20 touchdowns and pass for 20 touchdowns. That'll get you on the Dean's List every time.

These days, college basketball is all about the money. That's why the Dean's List would like to recognize Billy Gillespie. Seven months after becoming Kentucky's basketball coach, Gillespie hasn't signed his contract. He's still getting paid $2.3 million a year in base salary and there is a memorandum that lays out his compensation package, but it is refreshing to see a coach who is so concerned with his team that he doesn't have time to hire an agent or sign his contract. Of course, we could be completely misreading this and Gillespie could be haggling over better incentives, but we'll give Billy the benefit of the doubt, especially after his team's season-opening loss to Gardner-Webb.

My grandpappy always used to tell me, "Losing ain't easy." And he would know, the guy lost more card games than anyone in the state of North Carolina. But my grandfather never lost a basketball game quite as bad as the women's team at Fisk did Tuesday. The Bulldogs were just a little over matched by Lipscomb in a 123-22 loss. The 101-point loss was one point shy of the Division-I women's record for biggest margin of victory, or in this case, margin of defeat. Poor Fisk, their leading scorer only had eight points and at halftime they were already losing 61-10. On the positive side, they did make the Dean's List, and Marion Berry graduated from Fisk University. Now that's a notable alum.

The Dean's List would not be complete without the inclusion of a man named Macho. That's what everyone calls Virginia Tech cornerback Victor Harris. You see, last week, Macho was out at a nightclub in Blacksburg, Va., a nationally renowned location for nightclubs, when, contrary to his name, he broke up a fight involving Hokies wide receiver Justin Harper. Later that same night, after Macho and Harper returned from the club, someone riddled Macho's off-campus apartment with bullets. Thankfully, no one was hurt, but I can only assume that Macho's not happy. And at 6-feet, 203 pounds, you don't want to piss off Macho. After the incident, he had his fifth interception of the season and a runback of 44 yards in the game against Miami.

The Dean's List believes that, in a perfect world, all grudges would be determined through a good old-fashioned brawl. That seems more fair than bickering at each other through the media. Accordingly, former Georgia running back Herschel Walker has made this week's Dean's List by challenging South Carolina coach Steve Spurrier to a duel. (Ironically, he did this by grumbling through the media, but we'll let that slide.) Upset about Spurrier's comments on Georgia's group end zone celebration, Walker said, "That's totally insulting for a coach of his stature to say something so stupid ... So my question I say to him is, if he's got that much guts, why don't he step in a ring against me?" Somehow, I don't think Spurrier going to be taking Walker up on that challenge, but it's good to see a man stand and fight for what he believes in, mainly the Georgia Bulldogs.

High school kids, I'll tell ya, they say the darndest things sometimes. Take, for example, this week's Dean's List honoree Matt Patchan, an offensive tackle at Seffner Armwood High in Florida. Patchan, a potential Canes recruit, attended Miami's 48-0 loss to Virginia two weeks ago and mentioned to that there were players at the U that didn't really mind losing. "There's too many guys that it doesn't bother them that they lost the game," said Patchan. "Like it doesn't mean anything. They need to get rid of those types of guys." OK, so the kid can buy some leeway since his dad played for the Canes, but I can't imagine he's going to be welcomed with open arms if he chooses to go to Miami. Then again, coach Randy Shannon diplomatically responded to Patchan's comments by saying, "Everyone is entitled to their opinion." Well, if Coach isn't putting up a fight, then there might be some truth to the kid's observations.

You know what the world needs? More March Madness. Thanks to this week's Dean's List nominee, the Gazelle Group, instead of having two postseason college basketball tournaments, we will have three tournaments -- the NCAA, the NIT and the CBI -- that will allow 113 teams to compete for a title. The College Basketball Invitational will invite 16 teams and play single elimination games until the finals, which will be best two out of three. Is it necessary? Probably not, I mean, if you didn't even make the NIT you're probably not worth watching. However, was the extra Whiz on your cheesesteak necessary? Was it good? Exactly.

Field Hockey is a sport I've never understood, but that doesn't mean I don't appreciate it, especially when an undefeated season is involved. North Carolina won its fifth NCAA field hockey title and completed a spectacular loss-less season with a 3-0 victory over Penn State. The Tar Heels finished the season 24-0, earning themselves a spot on the Dean's List. They outscored their opponents 99-14 for the season. Domination has to be a wonderful feeling, even in one of the few sports that requires players to wear skirts.

Even if your football team sucks so bad that they can go 22 games without a win, you've got to have faith. That's what separates the fair-weather fans from the die hards. The Dean's List would like to honor all the Duke fans who thought they had a chance to beat Notre Dame in football this weekend. One fan even set up, "celebrating Duke's chance to beat Notre Dame in a real tackle football game!" Of course, even with Notre Dame in the midst of its worst season ever, Duke can't beat the Fighting Irish. The Blue Devils lost 28-7. Cheer up, Duke fans, there's always basketball. Then again, after last season, you might want to go for baseball.

It's a classic whodunit scenario in Atlanta. The facility manager at Georgia Tech's home court, the Alexander Memorial Coliseum, left work on an early November Friday night with the Yellow Jacket's 2004 Final Four banner hanging from the rafters. Saturday morning, the banner was gone. There were no signs of forced entry and no clues. The Dean's List has a few theories, though. Maybe Jarrett Jack pinched the banner to protest the fact that his jersey still hasn't been retired. Or, maybe it was Eddie Sutton, coach of Oklahoma State at the time, in retaliation for the Cowboy's 67-65 defeat at the hands of the Yellow Jackets in the Final Four. I can just see him scaling the catwalk. The police assessed the value of the banner at $550, but Sutton knows that a shot at a national title is priceless.

And so we round out the Dean's List. Join us next week, when we'll get to the bottom of UNC coach Roy Williams' year-long tan.