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Help Wanted

May 31, 2004
May 31, 2004

Table of Contents
May 31, 2004

NBA Playoffs

Help Wanted

ABC golf analyst Curtis Strange, 49, resigned last week, raising
the question, Who will replace him? No small part of the job is
maintaining a good relationship with Tiger Woods to get those
coveted postround interviews. (See: Kostis, Peter.) With that in
mind, here are seven people who could, or even should, sit in the
chair next to Mike Tirico.

This is an article from the May 31, 2004 issue

Dick Vitale --ODDS: 250 TO 1

PROS: Would bring energy, bay-BEE!

CONS: Don't want to hear Ty Tryon called a diaper dandy.

X-FACTOR: Years of bootlicking should make it easy for him to
ingratiate himself with Tiger.

Paul Azinger --ODDS: 25 TO 1

PROS: Smart and opinionated and has some TV experience.

CONS: Has become oddly mediaphobic in recent years.

X-FACTOR: Cancer survivors aren't afraid to say slump.

Hal Sutton --ODDS: 6 TO 1

PROS: As Ryder Cup captain, has plenty of time and has already
evaluated most players.

CONS: Thick Southern accent and he was tentative during a few
tryouts with ABC earlier this year.

X-FACTOR: Outdueled Tiger at the 2000 Players.

Corey Pavin --ODDS: 5 TO 1

PROS: Has credibility and knowledge and impressed in a try-out as
an on-course commentator for ESPN earlier this year.

CONS: Looks like Billy Bob Thornton in Sling Blade.

X-FACTOR: Like Tiger, hails from Southern California.

Brandel Chamblee --ODDS: 20 TO 1

PROS: Humorous, good storyteller, well-versed in the game.

CONS: Quit as part-time ABC announcer last year to take full-time
gig with the Golf Channel.

X-FACTORS: Has great hair; knows Tiger.

Charles Barkley --ODDS: 100 TO 1

PROS: Funny, outspoken and would take the heat off Johnny Miller.

CONS: His swing would make Craig Parry puke.

X-FACTOR: Appears in golf-related commercials with Tiger.

Dennis Miller --ODDS: 75 TO 1

PROS: Failed on Monday night, but highbrow golf fans may get more
of his arcane references.

CONS: Already working full-time as George Bush's p.r. hack.

X-FACTOR: Wouldn't hesitate to call Tiger babe, as in "Tig, I
haven't seen driving that crooked since Grace Kelly ran out for a
pack of Luckys and a bottle of Orangina, babe."

COLOR PHOTO: BILL FRAKES (VITALE)COLOR PHOTO: RON ANGLE/WIREIMAGE.COM (AZINGER)COLOR PHOTO: ANDREW REDINGTON/GETTY IMAGES (SUTTON)COLOR PHOTO: WALTER IOOSS JR. (BARKLEY)COLOR PHOTO: DARREN CARROLL (CHAMBLEE)COLOR PHOTO: AL MESSERSCHMIDT/WIREIMAGE.COM (PAVIN)COLOR PHOTO: IDA MAE ASTUTE/ABC (MILLER)