Bird-Watching

February 12, 2007

Every winter,record Tour crowds flock to the TPC Scottsdale during the FBR Open, many ofthem perching at the Bird's Nest party pavilion or in the stands surroundingthe raucous 16th hole. Last week more than 507,990 people descended on thetournament, including a wide variety of fan species. Here's a sampling.

Sudsus Maximus
QUAD-FISTED QUAFFER
Stores copious quantities of golden nectar to quench prodigious thirst

MamacitaTobacconista
CIGAR-CHOMPING BLONDIE
Orally fixated female, recognizable by plumes of smoke and platinum headfeathers

WormusCatcheratus
EARLY BIRD
Related to the rooster, builds nest by first light; subsists on celery andBloody Marys

ProdigaInfanta
MINI WIE
Experiences parental indoctrination to golf shortly after being hatched

CraniusCrayolius
FACE-PAINTED DODO
Marked by distinctive self-inflicted ink symbols on the forehead and by foamywebbed feet

VoiciferusNongratus
SILENT THUNDERBIRD
Cape- and bauble-clad host; incessantly insists on silence from the heedlessflock

CorporataFreeloada
FOODY FOODPECKER
Burrows into tented areas surrounding 16 and scavenges all manner of gratisedibles

FraternitusHomogeneus
EARSPLITTING WARBLERS
Migrating annually, this pack of brethren is given to banshee-like fits ofrelentless screeching

EveryoneaLookatmea
DESERT SWAN
Oblivious to the reason for the gathering, these male-seeking females exist inabundance

AttireusRidiculus
COSTUMED LOON
Attention-seeking oddity, instinctively dons inexplicably bizarre plumage

EldrickusNoshowus
TIGER WISHER
Loyal subject of the king of the golf jungle, who was last spotted here in2001

SlumberusNoonus
SLEEPING CUCKOO
Given to fits of midday narcolepsy, even amid the boisterous and bustlingsurroundings

TWELVE PHOTOSDarren Carroll

HOLE YARDS PAR R1 R2 R3 R4
OUT
HOLE YARDS PAR R1 R2 R3 R4
IN
Eagle (-2)
Birdie (-1)
Bogey (+1)
Double Bogey (+2)