Sorry Wolverines, The Governor Isn't Buying It!!

MiketheGovernorHenne

Sorry Wolverines, I’m not buying it. Sorry Detroit media pathetic homers, I am not filling my face with your delicious Wolverine soufflé. I am among the most biased of MSU fans, but I try very hard to be objective about my own team and MSU’s biggest rivals.

Paint downtown Detroit blue for all I care, I am not that impressed with Rich Rodriguez. So “M-Rod,” as we’ll refer to him from now on, is the new Wolverine coach. Everything that I have heard and seen points to desperation. Michigan wanted to dance with Ashley Judd and got Winona. Sure Winona sings awfully perrrdie (that means pretty if you're from West Virginia), but she sure ain’t no Ashley. Ok… I am done with the West Virginia jokes.

Michigan wanted Les Miles and made a pathetic spectacle of themselves in the process. The headlines around Detroit are so pathetic I have a hard time believing anyone can sell that rubbish. Wal-Mart Wolverines buy their university attire… well… at Wal-Mart and they buy there thought processes from… well… any Detroit media source that makes them feel like they are back on the winning team. Good luck with that!!

There is no denying that M-Rod is accomplished. He had WVU all but in the title game before they blew it (or is that BLUE IT!!) to a terrible Pitt Panther team at home. Just take a step back for just a minute, look at this schedule.

Western Michigan W 62-24
1-0
at Marshall (ESPN2) W 48-23
2-0
at Maryland (ESPN) W 31-14
3-0
East Carolina (ESPN+) W 48-7
4-0
at South Florida (ESPN2) L 21-13
4-1 (0-1)
at Syracuse (ESPN+) W 55-14
5-1 (1-1)
Miss. State (ESPN+) W 38-13
6-1
at Rutgers (ABC) W 31-3
7-1 (2-1)
Louisville (ESPN) W 38-31
8-1 (3-1)
at Cincinnati (ESPN) W 28-23
9-1 (4-1)
Connecticut (ABC)W 66-21
10-1 (5-1)
Pittsburgh (ESPN) L 13-9
10-2 (5-2)

Wow…now that is a national championship schedule and they won the Big Least Conference. Give me a break, MSU could have gone 11-1 or 10-2 against this schedule. All hail M-Rod!!! The 2009 National Championship trophy can be delivered to Ann Arbor immediately. What a sham. What a load of bull. They did beat Rutgers and Cincinnati on the road. Those are M-Rod’s two biggest victories of the season and the UM faithful are excited about a $4+ million dollar buyout. I love this headline… “Martin Gets His Man.” Oh please… this guy is good, but who was he good against? Look at Jim Tressel’s schedule and tell me M-Rod is Michigan’s answer. Who is really buying this crap?

Here is the reality. Martin was desperate. He thought he had Ashley locked up, refused to spend the money and got Winona. Michigan is going to go through huge changes in order to make the personnel work in M-Rod’s system. Where is Ron English next year? The guy who has held Michigan’s recruiting intact is going to run M-Rod’s 3-3-5 defense and sell it to recruits? The defense has been compared to a video game by one of Michigan’s commitments. According to this particular recruit, this is a good thing. Wow, the Detroit propaganda machine is in full swing.

This is NOT homerun hire. It was a good hire, but certainly not a better hire than Dantonio. M-Rod does not even have local or Midwest recruiting ties. I know, I know, Michigan is a national school, it can recruit anywhere. Yeah, kind of like you could take any head coach you wanted and plug him into the Michigan machine cause your Meeeechigan? Give me a break. You just bought out a coach who has been marginally more successful than a MAC conference champion and you want to spoon feed the good news to everyone. You traded in a ’67 Lincoln Continental for the General Lee? Well it certainly is a change, but it isn’t going to close the gap with the Buckeyes and it certainly left the door wide open for Mark Dantonio. As a diehard Spartan, I would personally like to thank Bill Martin for this most excellent hire. When you guys were talking Les Miles, I admit I was a little frightened. This just made 2007 one of the greatest years of my life. Let’s review 2007 shall we?

Michigan State had its largest spring game turnout in forever with Mark Dantonio at the helm. He instilled discipline, salvaged a better recruiting class than everyone thought he would and lead MSU to an unexpected 7-5 record with a Florida bowl game coming. Michigan craps the proverbial bed against App St. Dantonio takes a moment of silence. Michigan follows it up by being blown out at home against Oregon. The game was over at halftime. Michigan State plays every team on their schedule close and loses 5 games all by less than a TD (yes even to UM). Michigan celebrates their arrogance and drops their last two games of the season. Lloyd Carr, Michigan legend, announces his retirement. Les Miles uses Michigan for a contract-negotiating tool. Michigan basketball loses to Harvard. Michigan is then relegated to their sixth choice to replace Lloyd. Michigan basketball loses to CMU. M-Rod is hired and the Wolverines will now live happily ever after.

Ok… sounds good… it’s all very convincing… got to admit I am wondering how we’ll ever compete. I am guessing Spartan and Wolverine football will look something like Spartan and Wolverine basketball in 2-3 years. Hey anyone got Ryan Mallet’s address? I’d like to send him a Christmas card with some money to help him move all of his personal effects to Arkansas. Happy Holidays Wolverine Homers!!

*This article does not reflect the opinion of Hondo and is the sole opinion of Mike “The Governor” Henne.

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