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Dwight Howard Struggling To Cope With The Death Of Son's Mother

The mother of Howard's six-year-old son died about six weeks ago during the COVID-19 pandemic.

Dwight Howard has been struggling since the mother of his six-year-old son, Melissa Rios, died on March 27 after having an epileptic seizure at her home in Calabasas. She was 31. 

"It’s extremely difficult for me to try to understand how to talk to my son who’s six years old just about the whole situation," Howard said on a conference call Friday. "Something I’ve never experienced. So I wouldn’t know how to talk to my son about it. So just with him being here and stuff like that, it’s kind of given me some extra life."

About a month and a half ago, Howard was texting with Rios about her coming to Georgia, where he had been sheltering in place with his five children since the NBA was suspended March 11 because of the COVID-19 pandemic. 

"As I was texting, that’s when I got the call that she just passed," Howard said. 

Howard hasn't left his house much, but he wasn't willing to miss her funeral services in April in Reno, Nevada. 

"There was no way I could not be there for my son and even for her family," Howard said. "I definitely would’ve felt like that would’ve been bad. She deserves and he would deserve better if I didn’t do that that."

It's been a rough year for Howard. 

Just over three months ago, Howard said he had cried himself to sleep many nights after his former Laker teammate Kobe Bryant died in a helicopter crash along with his 13-year-old daughter Gianna and seven other people on Jan. 26. Then he suffered another loss that was even much closer to his family. 

"It's actually been one of the toughest things I've ever had to deal with," Howard said. "...It's just like one event after another. The Kobe situation, still trying to get over, just grieve over that. Even though me and Kobe wasn't as close as me and my son's mom were, but just trying to grieve over that, and then the corona situation, and then all of a sudden my son's mom died. I've really just been trying to keep myself busy -- train a lot, spend time with my kids." 

Howard has passed the last two months boxing and doing the workout that the character Saitama does from the Netflix anime series 'One Punch Man,' which consists of 100 pushups, 100 sit ups, 100 squats and running two miles.

He also has been playing hide-and-go-seek with his children on his 23-acre property and taking them to the lake and the pool. He plays Uno with them and even built them a slide in the front yard. 

"School has been the hardest part for all of us," Howard said. 

Howard intends to remain in Georgia even though the Lakers' practice facility in El Segundo will reportedly open Saturday under strict restrictions. 

"I probably will stay here until everything’s cleared up to where we can leave," Howard said. "I would love to go back to L.A. and start working out with the team and everything like that, but I’ve been training here, and once everything opens up then I can travel on to LA and start working."

Before the hiatus, the Lakers were atop the Western Conference with a record of 49-14. They had made the playoffs for the first time since 2013 and were hoping to compete for their first championship since 2010. 

If the season were to resume, Howard said the break will undoubtedly pose challenges for the team. But he has no doubt that the Lakers will recover. 

"We were really on our way, and now we had to standstill where we can’t do anything," Howard said. "We really can’t see each other. We can’t grow together. We can’t bond together like we were doing. And then trying to pick that back up where we left off when we’re separate, it’s kind of tough. But I think with the group of guys that we have, I also think with the hunger that we have to win a championship, once we get back. it will be like we never left each other."

Howard, who signed a one-year, non-guaranteed contract with the Lakers over the offseason for $2.56 million, had established himself as an important role player on the team. He was averaging 7.5 points, 7.4 rebounds and 1.2 blocked shots in 19.2 minutes a game. 

Before this season, his career was flailing. After a disastrous stint with the Lakers in 2012-2013, he went on to play for five teams, getting waived by two of them. 

But this time around, Howard, an eight-time All-Star, had found success again.

"After I had my back surgery, the last one, I promised myself that I would change my life," Howard said. "I was going to do whatever it’s going to take to heal myself physically, mentally and spiritually. I spent that summer doing that, and before the season, I promised to give my teammates energy, all of me, every single night."

Even though being away from basketball has been frustrating, everything that's happened this year has put things into perspective for him. 

He's learned a lot the past few months. 

And he knows what's most important. 

"It’s bittersweet because I do want to play basketball, but my son right now needs me more than anything," he said.