5 Reasons Fishing With a Woman Will Test Your Fragile Ego

Fishing with women can be an exercise in patience and humility.

Women often outfish men, which can hurt a guy's fragile ego. | Joe Shead

"I see you brought your cheater," Tashina said, pointing at my electronics the first time I took her ice fishing.

"Well just watch how this works," I said. I'd brought her to a lake that was loaded with crappies. I hoped they wouldn't disappoint.

"Okay, that red down there is the bottom," I said, gesturing at the screen. "These little marks are actually fish. Okay, that's your jig coming down."

About that time, one of the marks started rising.

"Here comes a fish," I explained. "You got him," I said as the bars representing the fish and the lure melted into one and the line went slack.

"I do?" Tashina asked.

"Yeah, just reel," I replied.

The rod tip bent. "Oh, that's cool!" Tashina exclaimed. She never called the unit a "cheater" again.

I know. This sounds like a pleasant, even successful outing. But guys, be warned, fishing with women has taught me some hard lessons—mostly about myself.

1. She Will Make You Explain Things

If you fish with a woman, she will want you to explain why you're doing the things you do. As men, we know the answer is "because that's the way we've always done them!" But women need reasoning. | Joe Shead

If you take a woman fishing, at some point she’s going to ask the most dangerous question a man can hear: "Why do you do it that way?"

Men don’t know why. We just do it that way because it worked once. Maybe years ago. Possibly by accident. That’s reason enough. But women want logic. Context. History. So suddenly you’re explaining rod choices, lure colors and lake selection like you’re defending a doctoral thesis on things you’ve never actually thought about before.

2. She Will Bring More Gear Than You Planned For

We were happy to add this ice scooper Tashina found to our arsenal. To be fair, she has learned a lot about fishing, and she is clearly holding this scoop closer to the camera to make it look bigger. | Joe Shead

Guys pack for fishing with brutal efficiency. If it doesn’t catch fish or keep you warm (or possibly give you a buzz), it’s probably unnecessary.

Women, on the other hand, prepare for contingencies. Comfort. Unexpected scenarios. The result is that the sled fills up fast. Somehow, by the time you’re loaded, you’re deciding whether one of your rods can stay behind. Maybe even your ice auger.

You may eventually find yourself sitting in a small shelter, under-equipped, wondering how this happened? Meanwhile, she’s perfectly comfortable and asking why you don’t look like you’re having fun.

3. She Will Make You Fish Other Spots

If you fish with women, they may not want to drive on ice or travel long distances. You may end up fishing spots that they pick instead. Often, you will end up catching fish! | Joe Shead

With your buddies, the routine is simple. Plenty of ice. Little snow. Trucks have been driving across this frozen lake for weeks. You drive to your best spot without a second thought.

It's different with a woman. She’s fine with fishing, but water is still water. Driving a mile across a frozen lake isn’t comforting, no matter how many times you explain ice thickness.

So you walk out. After straining to pull an overloaded sled for about 30 seconds, reality sets in. There is no chance you’re making it to your favorite spot.

She suggests fishing closer. You resist. You explain "the fishing isn’t good there,” despite the fact you've never fished there. It's just the way you've always done it. Like how you drive a Ford for no other reason than because your dad drives a Ford. A discussion follows. Maybe an argument. Eventually, you apologize and fish where she wants to fish. You will probably limit out.

4. She Will Want to Take Different Kinds of Pictures

Tashina always wants to take weird pictures with fish. In fact, it's very difficult to get a normal picture of her holding a fish! | Joe Shead

Men want proof. Clear shots. Fish held properly. Evidence.

Women want personality. Poses. Moments. Sometimes the fish are kissing. Sometimes the angler is kissing the fish. Sometimes there’s an eye roll. Sometimes you just want one normal photo and realize that’s asking a lot.

If you’re an outdoor writer, this can be mildly stressful. If you’re a regular guy, it’s mostly amusing. 

5. She Will Absolutely Out-Fish You

Tashina holds a chunky largemouth bass that she caught the first time we fished "her lake." Minutes later she caught a 34-inch northern pike. | Joe Shead

Teach a man to fish, feed him for a lifetime.

Teach a woman to fish, and prepare to be out-fished for a lifetime.

Whether it’s patience, focus, or luck, women often just catch more fish. The first time I brought Tashina to what we now call “her lake,” she landed a 34-inch pike and an 18-inch largemouth, just minutes apart.

Last weekend we went back. While buying minnows, the bait shop owner mentioned his weekly fishing contest. I had a feeling we’d be returning to his shop.

We did. She won. (See the pike pic at the beginning of the story. You know, the one with the strange, mouth-open pose). And I'm not talking about the fish!

What Matters More Than Being Right About Fishing

At some point, you learn to swallow your pride. Better yet, you learn to be proud of her instead of jealous. The truth is if you can’t enjoy watching someone you care about succeed, even when they’re holding the bigger fish, you’re going to have a long, miserable life.