32 Ridiculous Dynasty Fantasy Football Team Names—One for Each NFL Franchise
Full disclosure, I’m eminently mediocre at naming fantasy football teams.
Like three years ago, my team was called Justin Fields Forever, a moniker that embarrassingly mashed up my love of the Chicago Bears and the Beatles.
A garbage name, I know, but I won that league, so it’s possible that slick waiver wire work can overcome mediocre naming skills.
That said, the conceit of this article is solid: I’m dropping 32 team names, all of which are based on an intriguing 2025 rookie from each franchise. I give you full permission to use any of the below names for your own dynasty team, but please do so at your own risk.
Oh, P.S. – Unsurprisingly, there’re multiple Beatles-centric entries. You’re welcome.
Arizona Cardinals
Intriguing Rookie: Walter Nolen, DT
- Dynasty Nickname: Nolen in the Deep
Atlanta Falcons
Intriguing Rookie: James Pearce Jr., EDGE
- Dynasty Nickname: Make Pearce, Not War
Baltimore Ravens
Intriguing Rookie: Malaki Starks, S
- Dynasty Nickname: Starks Raving Mad
Buffalo Bills
Intriguing Rookie: Maxwell Hairston, CB
- Dynasty Nickname: Maxwell’s Silver Hammer Time
Carolina Panthers
Intriguing Rookie: Tetairoa McMillan, WR
- Dynasty Nickname: T-Mac and Cheese
Chicago Bears
Intriguing Rookie: Colston Loveland, TE
- Dynasty Nickname: All You Need is Loveland
Cincinnati Bengals
Intriguing Rookie: Shemar Stewart, EDGE
- Dynasty Nickname: Beef Stewart
Cleveland Browns
Intriguing Rookie: Mason Graham, DT
- Dynasty Nickname: Graham’s Anatomy
Dallas Cowboys
Intriguing Rookie: Tyler Booker, OG
- Dynasty Nickname: Booked, Bothered, and Bewildered
Denver Broncos
Intriguing Rookie: Jahdae Barron, CB
- Dynasty Nickname: The Barron Identity
Detroit Lions
Intriguing Rookie: Tyleik Williams, DT
- Dynasty Nickname: Ty Hard With a Vengence
Green Bay Packers
Intriguing Rookie: Matthew Golden, WR
- Dynasty Nickname: Stay Golden, MatthewBoy
Houston Texans
Intriguing Rookie: Jaylin Smith, CB
- Dynasty Nickname: Mr. and Mr. Smith
Indianapolis Colts
Intriguing Rookie: Tyler Warren, TE
- Dynasty Nickname: Tyler the Creator
Jacksonville Jaguars
Intriguing Rookie: Travis Hunter, CB/WR
- Dynasty Nickname: How I Met Your Hunter
Kansas City Chiefs
Intriguing Rookie: Josh Simmons, OT
- Dynasty Nickname: Keeping Up With the Joshes
Las Vegas Raiders
Intriguing Rookie: Ashton Jeanty, RB
- Dynasty Nickname: Pain In the Ashton
Los Angeles Chargers
Intriguing Rookie: Omarion Hampton, RB
- Dynasty Nickname: Hampton’s In
Los Angeles Rams
Intriguing Rookie: Mykel Williams, EDGE
- Dynasty Nickname: MykelPhone Check, One Two
Miami Dolphins
Intriguing Rookie: Kenneth Grant, DT
- Dynasty Nickname: Kenny G’s Spot
Minnesota Vikings
Intriguing Rookie: Tai Felton, WR
- Dynasty Nickname: Live and Let Tai
New England Patriots
Intriguing Rookie: Will Campbell, OT
- Dynasty Nickname: Where There’s a Will, There’s a Campbell
New Orleans Saints
Intriguing Rookie: Kelvin Banks Jr., OT
- Dynasty Nickname: Banks for the Memories
New York Giants
Intriguing Rookie: Abdul Carter, EDGE
- Dynasty Nickname: Carter Before the Horse
New York Jets
Intriguing Rookie: Armand Membou, OT
- Dynasty Nickname: Armand’s Hammers
Philadelphia Eagles
Intriguing Rookie: Mason Taylor, TE
- Dynasty Nickname: Mason Taylor’s Swift
Pittsburgh Steelers
Intriguing Rookie: Derrick Harmon, DT
- Dynasty Nickname: Harmon Eyes
San Francisco 49ers
Intriguing Rookie: Mykel Williams, EDGE
- Dynasty Nickname: Good Williams Hunting
Seattle Seahawks
Intriguing Rookie: Grey Zabel, OG
- Dynasty Nickname: Ready, Zabel, and Willing
Tampa Bay Buccaneers
Intriguing Rookie: Emeka Egbuka, WR
- Dynasty Nickname: Emeka of Football
Tennessee Titans
Intriguing Rookie: Cam Ward, QB
- Dynasty Nickname: The Art of Ward
Washington Commanders
Intriguing Rookie: Josh Conerly Jr., OT
- Dynasty Nickname: Josh It Like It’s Hot
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-82121a1351894b8089c555f4b4b69420-1d609352940036e7455770363a74a2e9.png "Alan Goldsher")
Alan Goldsher has written about sports for Sports Illustrated, ESPN, Apple, Playboy, NFL.com, and NBA.com, and he’s the creator of the Chicago Sports Stuff Substack. He’s the bestselling author of 15 books, and the founder/CEO of Gold Note Records. Alan lives in Chicago, where he writes, makes music, and consumes and creates way too much Bears content. You can visit him at http://www.AlanGoldsher.com and http://x.com/AlanGoldsher.