Only in an SEC Home Can the Dallas Cowboys Face the San Diego Fighting Eyebrows
FAYETTEVILLE, Ark. – There are things outside of the SEC footprint that are a given that people in those areas can't comprehend don't carry over inside it. Perhaps the most difficult is the idea that college teams are the professional sports organizations in those states.
However, even among SEC states, Arkansas stands above the rest when it comes to this aspect of local culture. That's because in other areas of the conference outside of Missouri and Vanderbilt, football carries high priority. Even Kentucky is wild about football until November rolls around. Yet, it doesn't carry over to the other two major sports like it does in Arkansas.
Mississippi State, Ole Miss and LSU may be wild about baseball, but other than every now and then in Baton Rouge, there's not a whole lot of fan interest on the basketball side of things. Same for South Carolina. Florida gets close at being a true three-sport fan base, but basketball can be hit or miss with the Gators.
Only at Arkansas are there regular sellouts for all three sports even though Baum-Walker and Bud Walton Arena are among the largest venues in their respective sports. That's why it's possible for a large number of sports fans in Arkansas to be casual fans of professional sports teams and that might be stretching it. There are families in the state who don't watch professional sports at all.
The latter is the environment in which my children grew up. No one on either side of the family has a professional team they follow. Because of our time bouncing back and forth between Arkansas and Dallas, my wife catches the Cowboys every now and then and also the Rangers once they got into the playoffs far enough to get their games off Bally's. However, my 11-year-old son has seen three Rangers games his whole life, two of which were in person because they can't be seen on most North Texas providers, and between he and my 18-year-old daughter, they might have seen a combined four games.
However, thanks to my wife, their grandparents, and my job, they have seen more Razorback games in person than they have seen professional sports games in any fashion combined. That includes the Super Bowl, during which they ask to be notified when commercials come on so they know to come watch, then disappear once the game picks back up. They have strong feelings about Kentucky, Alabama and Texas A&M, but probably can't name more than two or three pro teams if asked on the spot.
That's what made the moment about to be described possible. After months of being out of our home because of a fire, we were sitting down for our first meal as a family in our house since the Razorbacks were still playing baseball. Sure, the floors were exposed concrete and and the table was a patio set drug in from out back because all of our belongings are still packed away in storage while we wait for floors to be installed, but it felt great to eat a meal in our own home together regardless.
My son had borrowed my phone while the rest of us finished eating, happy to take part in the conversation while he scrolled to his heart's content. That's when he said something that caught both my me and my wife off guard.
"Who are the Eyebrows?"
"I don't think I heard you. What did you say?"
"Who are the Eyebrows?"
"Did you just ask 'Who are the Eyebrows?'"
"Yeah. There's a graphic on your phone that says the Cowboys are playing the Eyebrows."
"I"m not sure what you're talking about. I think the Cowboys are playing the San Diego Chargers." (Yes, they're the LA Chargers, but I neither remembered it, not am I willing to call them that.)
That's when my daughter wandered from her seat over to my son's side of the table.
"Nope. It says they're playing the Eyebrows."
"Let me see what he's looking at."
She then flashed the phone at me and sure enough it was the Dallas Cowboys star next to the curved electrical symbol (lightning bolt?) that arcs across the top of the Chargers helmet. Both my wife and I tried to explain that's supposed to be a bolt of electricity, but the kids weren't having it.
"You can say it's a lighting bolt all you want, but that's definitely an eyebrow. They are playing the Eyebrows. I don't care what you say," my daughter said.
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And it's not like they were willing to let it go. As we flipped through the channels Monday night, my son saw the Chargers' logo on the screen just before the Monday Night Football game.
"Hey, the Eyebrows are playing!" he exclaimed.
"That's right son. The San Diego Eyebrows are playing. Now, let's see if something good is on TV worth watching."
Only in an SEC house. Even more, probably only in a home owned by people born and raised in Arkansas. Good luck unseeing that bushy eyebrow on their helmets and merchandise the rest of your life though.
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