Kansas vs. Kentucky: Player Ratings to the Theme of Original NES Sports Games
Kansas-Kentucky. A classic college basketball matchup. When historic programs like the Jayhawks and Wildcats meet and deliver an action packed thriller like we saw on Tuesday night, the player ratings has to take a step up as well. Some will argue this point, and those that do are wrong, but the original Nintendo is the single greatest gaming console of all time. It’s iconic and changed video games forever. So, here at player rating headquarters, we’re rating the players’ performances based on original NES sports games.
In case you’ve missed it, here is how we rate them:
5 Stars: Out of this world performance. This is a hard to achieve rating and is only reserved for the most impressive or impressionable performances.
4.5 Stars: Very strong performance, packed the stat sheet, provided undeniable intangibles.
4 Stars: A strong performance that falls just short of the standards above.
3.5 Stars: Above average performance, perhaps stands out in one category or one aspect of the game.
3 Stars: Average performance. Also could be a very strong game in one aspect but a very poor game in another such as 15 points but seven turnovers. Could also be that the player played, did their job, but didn't do much spectacularly.
2 Stars: Below average performance, or we simply have higher expectations for the player on this particular night.
1 Star: Rare, but if a player has a stinker in all aspects.
5 Stars: RBI Baseball
This is the best sports video game ever invented, and to me, it’s not particularly close. I have played out multiple complete baseball seasons with friends of mine (yes fellow nerds, we kept track of key stats via a spreadsheet) and it only featured 12 teams. I always play with the Twins. Give me Frank Viola on the mound and Kirby Puckett, Kent Hrbek, Gary Gaetti and Tom Brunansky behind him thank you very much.
I’m starting with the obvious. Hunter Dickinson getting 27 points and grabbing 21 rebounds is just absurd. Sure, Kentucky was without their biggest men, but Hunter still had a lot of work to do and he earned this 20/20 game. The three as the clock expired in the first half has huge, but the move he put on the baseline to secure his last points from the floor was equally as good and arguably more important. And let’s not downplay the postgame interview with Holly Rowe when Dickinson (rightfully) told the world that Kansas is the all-time leader in wins in college basketball history. Instant legend.
I’m not sure anyone had Dajuan Harris setting a career high in points (23) on five of six shooting from behind the arc, but if you did, do as Kyle said in the post game Hawking Points and immediately get to Las Vegas. Kansas would’ve been blown away if it wasn’t for Harris, and his back to back threes in the second half helped swing the momentum in KU’s favor. He added seven assists in this one, but his four turnovers were a blemish on an otherwise great night.
4.5 Stars: Tecmo Super Bowl
I think we all know the legend behind Bo Jackson in this game, but I liked using the Houston Oilers for some reason. Whatever your team, you only had six plays to choose from and defensively, how amazing was it when you chose the right play?
Talk about a triple double that went completely under the radar. Kevin McCullar’s shooting was unreliable at best, his three of eleven shooting not worthy of a five star rating. He missed all three of his attempts from behind the arc, but when you fill the stat sheet the way Kevin did, your rating remains high. 12/10/10 is pretty great no matter how you cut it.
4 Stars: Punch Out
This might be the most iconic game on this entire list, a lot of that of course because of Mike Tyson but with fighters like Soda Popinski and Glass Joe, name recognition was through the roof (with 8-15 year olds in 1987).
KJ Adams is so important for Kansas. KJ got 16 points on eight of eleven shooting, and most importantly, he’s putting himself in a position to get easy baskets. His attempt from three was ill-advised and his free throw shooting left a lot to be desired (0-3 on the night) but his energy is contagious and Kansas isn’t as good when he sits on the bench. Probably a little bit unlucky to get called for that fifth foul as well.
3.5 Stars: Excite Bike
I really liked Excite Bike, but never having a Nintendo at my house, I couldn’t adequately memorize where all the oil slicks were like my friends could. Side note: isn't it amazing how we could remember the smallest details in these games (I can still remember where all the extra lives are in Super Mario Bros Three) but couldn't remember some of the basics of history that we should've learned in school?
This wasn’t Elmarko Jackson’s best game as a Jayhawk, but he was so much better than anyone off the bench that his star rating is higher than it might normally have been. He finished with seven points and two assists.
It was pretty telling that Jamari McDowell was on the court in the crucial last three minutes instead of KU’s other freshmen. If these minutes are anything to go by, McDowell could be a defensive stopper this season and certainly has the confidence of Bill Self in his corner. Jamari also iced the game with two free throws.
3 Stars: Track and Field
Did you ever know a kid who had the Power Pad? You know, the Nintendo accessory that you could run and jump on? Well, one of the great tricks to the long jump in track and field was to run in place on the Power Pad and jump off right when the long jump starts. You then stay off and watch your man sail forever into gold medal glory.
Parker Braun was the only player on the KU bench that had significant minutes to do much of anything, scoring one basket and grabbing two rebounds.
2 Stars: Duck Hunt
Duck Hunt came with the original Nintendo (along with Super Mario Brothers) and apparently only works on tube style TVs because the gun has to pick up light rays from it or some such technological scientific mumbo jumbo.
This game wasn’t made for Johnny Furphy. The Aussie missed both of his three point attempts while committing three fouls. He’s a freshman and you can chalk this up to his age and the fact that he’s never played in a game like this before.
The same cannot be said of Nick Timberlake. An elder statesmen of college basketball, Timberlake simply didn’t show up. After a great start to the season against NC Central, the Towson transfer has failed to impress and if he isn't going to make threes, Furphy and McDowell could start to take his minutes.
1 Star: RBI Baseball 2 and 3
These games are the antithesis of the original. For one, they had all the teams and complete rosters. No one wants or needs to play with Luis Aquino when there are other options. Sorry, Luis. And the players started to look semi-realistic. Nope. I want short and fat and extremely pixelated, thank you very much.
No one was a one-star in this one.
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