The Brutal Truth About Getting Recruited: A Former Power Five Coach Breaks Down a 600-DM Day

A former Power Four coach explains how one day and 600 messages revealed the truth about who actually gets noticed.

Rutgers Football Coach Greg Schiano talks on phone as he watches the early part of Rumson Fair Haven Caldwell game. Rumson-Fair Haven football loses to Caldwell 18-14 in state title game Fbcwrf221204hhh / Peter Ackerman / USA TODAY NETWORK

Last season, when I was still coaching and evaluating full-time, I learned a truth about recruiting that even my years in this game hadn’t fully prepared me for.

A Look Back at What My Inbox Taught Me About Today’s Recruiting Chaos

I’ve lived this sport from every angle — first as a nationally ranked high school quarterback navigating the chaos of my own recruitment, then as a high school offensive coordinator developing young athletes, and eventually as a Power Five coach at Virginia Tech, Virginia, and Miami, as well as a recruiting coordinator at Christopher Newport. I’ve sat in war rooms, built recruiting boards, evaluated talent for some of the biggest programs in the country, and spent years studying what really separates prospects. And yet, despite everything I had seen, the most eye-opening lesson came from something as simple as my inbox.

It wasn’t even 3 p.m. on a typical afternoon last season when I looked down and saw 223 unread messages from student-athletes seeking an opportunity. By the time night hit, that number had exploded past 600. That was just one day — and it revealed the harsh, unforgiving reality of modern recruiting in a way nothing else had.

The Volume Is Overwhelming — and Most Never Realize It

From the outside, it’s easy to assume coaches are sitting around waiting for prospects to reach out, but last season showed me how far from the truth that really is. College coaches’ inboxes overflow every day with hundreds of messages from athletes hoping to stand out, and social media has only intensified the noise. Between highlight reels, camp invites, transfer portal movement, and 7-on-7 exposure, the flow of information is constant and relentless. Players often believe their message is one of a few—a chance for a coach to take a look. In reality, that message is just one among hundreds competing for those same few minutes of attention. That’s the part most athletes and parents never see.

In a Pile of 600 Messages, What Makes One Kid Stand Out?

When you're sorting through that kind of volume, certain things become clear right away. Only a small percentage of athletes truly separate themselves from the pack, and it’s rarely because they wrote the longest message or posted the flashiest highlight edit. The players who rose last season were the ones who communicated clearly and gave evaluators exactly what they needed without making them dig. They sent short, organized messages with their essential information laid out plainly. They shared film that showed who they were as actual football players—not just a handful of their best moments. They provided verifiable athletic markers that helped paint a more complete picture. They added context about their role, production, and versatility. And maybe most importantly, they carried themselves with a level of maturity and coachability that spoke louder than any highlight clip.

The Reality Is Harsh, But the Opportunity Is Real

The biggest lesson I learned last season is that most athletes blend in, not because they lack the ability, but because they don’t understand how to present themselves in a way that rises above the noise. Kids assume talent alone will get them seen, but in a world where hundreds of athletes send DMs before lunch, talent is only the starting point. The encouraging side of that reality is that separating yourself is much more attainable than most people think. The overwhelming majority of messages look the same, sound the same, and lack the detail coaches need to evaluate quickly. That means the athletes who are prepared, detailed, and intentional immediately jump out—not because they’re perfect prospects, but because they respect the process and understand how competitive this space truly is.

Final Thought

Whenever athletes ask, “Why didn’t they respond?” I think back to those days last season when 600 messages filled my inbox before the end of the day. The question players should be asking isn’t why a coach didn’t reply—it’s what they’re doing to make themselves impossible to overlook. In a recruiting world this crowded, separation is earned, not given. And the kids who learn how to separate themselves early are the ones who succeed. That’s the lesson last season taught me, and it’s the reality every athlete should understand moving forward.