That’s not your usual hockey fight. 

By Dan Gartland and Extra Mustard
May 03, 2017

The Penguins and Capitals have played a really chippy series and Caps center Jay Beagle is threatening to take things off the ice—just not the way you might think. 

In the wake of the Matt Niskanen hit on Sidney Crosby that left Sid with a concussion, Beagle said playoff hockey “should be nasty.” He wasn’t talking about Niskanen’s hit, obviously, but that’s the way Phil Kessel interpreted it when the quote made it back to him in the Pittsburgh dressing room. 

“If he thinks that’s clean, then he’s an idiot,” Kessel chirped

A reporter relayed Kessel’s comments back to Beagle, continuing this incessant game of telephone. 

“Ouch. That hurts. That’s not very nice,” Beagle said, with more sarcasm than I thought was even possible, before reiterating that Niskanen’s hit wasn’t clean. 

If Beagle’s tone didn’t already indicate how little stock he put in Kessel’s comments, what he said next really clarified it. 

“It hurts. I’m hurt deeply,” Beagle said. “If he wants to settle it, we could always play some Mario Kart. He knows where to find me. We’ll take it there.”

We obviously need to have this happen, but there are a lot of unanswered questions. N64 or Wii? Which track do they use? Is it winner take all or a best of seven series? Does NBC have the broadcast rights?

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