Vanity Fair has a new story all about how great Alex Rodriguez and Jennifer Lopez’s relationship is. (Spoiler: so, so great.) “We are very much twins,” A-Rod gushes, pointing out that they even share a Zodiac sign. They seem to be genuinely happy together.
This is honestly pretty shocking, given how their first date went.
Then: “She told me around the third or fourth inning that she was single,” he says. “I had to get up and go re-adjust my thoughts. I went to the bathroom and got enough courage to send her a text.”
“So I’m sitting there and he’s walking back, and I get a text,” Lopez continues. “It says . . . ” She looks significantly at Rodriguez. “You can tell her!” he says. “ ‘You look sexy AF,’ ” she tells me. They both laugh. “And then it took a turn,” Lopez says. “The fire alarm went off, and we had to evacuate.” I laugh, thinking she’s being metaphorical. “No, really,” she says. “The fire alarm went off!”
In case you needed any more proof that A-Rod is an insecure nerd, there you go. It would be perfectly normal for him to be sitting across the table from Lopez and say, “You look beautiful tonight.”
That’s what a normal person would do. But A-Rod and J-Lo are not normal people. They’ve been celebrities for decades. He could have easily said instead, “You’re even more beautiful than when we met for the first time at Shea Stadium.” That’s totally reasonable. But no, he freaked out and ran to the bathroom because a girl made his palms sweat. Celebs, they’re just like us!