Marcellus Wiley’s Tacos Are an Affront to Nature

Why so much ketchup? WHY?!
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I’ve always liked Marcellus Wiley. I think it’s absolutely incredible that he played running back and returned kicks in college at Columbia before beefing up to play defensive end. I think it’s amazing that he managed to be a second-round draft pick out of a historically terrible football school. He’s also a pretty good commentator on ESPN. 

But this? This is unforgivable. 

Even setting aside the redundancy of being “Vegan, Vegetarian, & Pescatarian,” what the hell is he thinking? That’s so, so much ketchup. Even if we give Wiley the benefit of the doubt that some sweet ketchup is a good addition to offset a spicy taco, that’s way too much ketchup. You’d get dirty looks if you put that much ketchup on one hot dog, let alone 10 tacos. Those are ketchup tacos garnished with chicken. 

Jeez, I’m so worked up about the ketchup I don’t even feel like getting into why soft tacos are superior.