Carolina Panthers quarterback Cam Newton announced Thursday he would no longer Dab in the 2016 season.
Newton helped popularize the dance to the NFL audience after it had already popped up around the country. Newton said he’s working on different celebrations to replace the Dab, and we have some ideas on what Newton can do every time he scores next season:
Hand the ball back to the ref, son
The ultimate celebration is no celebration at all.
Write a letter to the troops
Only if Newton actually loves the freedom to celebrate.
Shake a defender’s hand
A touchdown isn’t impressive unless someone else was playing defense on the play.
If Newton truly believes he’s not above the team.
Look a reporter in the eye and answer their question
This is literally the most important way for us to judge someone’s character.
Puff his chest, thrust his pelvis and arrogantly strut in the face of his opponent
Because football is supposed to be fun.