The most unlikely scenario

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Both semifinal second legs were highly entertaining matches: Liverpool-Chelsea for the tense drama and deafly loud Scouser crowd, Milan-Manchester United for the sheer surprise of seeing mighty United get fully exposed and dominated in a way it hasn't been all season.

Here at Rankingsville, though, it creates a nightmare we've never had to deal with before. Neither of the two Champions League finalists are anywhere near tops in their own domestic league, nor are they alive in any other cup competitions. Therefore, sayeth the Rankings guru, neither deserves the No. 1 spot.

So after running our numbers through our high-tech Stanford University particle-accelerating quantum Rankings transmogrifier, we hereby leave Man Utd on top. The Red Devils still are on the cusp of winning the English Premier League which, to me, has been the best league in the world this season (this season, folks, don't pillory me yet) and stand a good chance at hoisting the FA Cup, perhaps the world's toughest domestic cup competition.

Unsatisfying like a nil-nil draw? Perhaps. But what the transmogrifier says, goes. Got a problem with it? You know what to do.

• In other news, we're going to toot our own horn and point out that, of the 16 clubs that advanced to the knockout phase of the Copa Libertadores, seven were on our all-South American Rankings back in January. And if you knew Internacional and River Plate were going to self-destruct, well, congratulations -- you and Lalas clearly were given a sports almanac from the future.

Note: All rankings, records and statistics are through May 2.