Weekend Primer

Missouri at Oklahoma. After thrashing Nebraska last week 41-6, Mizzou's Chase Daniel described the Blackshirts' defensive scheme as "high school stuff." Meanwhile, after the Sooners' Red River win over UT, Bob Stoops said, "In the end, what does beating Texas do? It doesn't do anything... You're not gonna get a lot of pats on the back around here for doing that." Nice to see humility is back in college football. Pick: Sooners by 10

Louisiana-Monroe at North Texas. By all counts Arizona-USC should occupy this slot, but ULM and North Texas' combined record of 1-9 wins the day. Besides, USC could end up here next week when they face fellow bottom feeder Notre Dame. Speaking of USC ... Pick: ULM by 7

USC's quest to fulfill Jim Harbaugh's now-Nostradamus-esque prophecy as the greatest college football team ever continues in Los Angeles, where the Trojans host Arizona. The question is, what was more surprising last week: the sight of Stanford fans gleefully celebrating in the Coliseum, or the fact that Stanford actually has fans? Pick: USC by 21 ... or Arizona by 1

As the SEC continues to back up Les Miles' claim that USC has an easier road than if they played in Dixie (and to be fair, the SEC does boast programs like Mississippi State, also known as the 'Stanford of the South'), Georgia takes on perennial powerhouse Vanderbilt. After last week's beatdown at the hands of the Vols, the Dawgs may not want a piece of another team from Tennessee. Pick: Dawgs by 7

Tracking the fortunes of college football's greatest corporation, Notre Dame, we find the stock to be ... up, after getting on the board with a scrappy 20-6 win at UCLA. They'll host undefeated holy rival Boston College before turning their attention to the upcoming showdown with that other Pac-10 juggernaut from California (Stanford -- Nov. 24). Pick: Catholic school wins by 13

This week's collegiate law enforcement roundup takes us back to Texas, but not to preferred destination Austin. This time we go to Lubbock, where Texas Tech hosts Texas A&M. Red Raider linebacker Kellen Tillman was suspended following his arrest for marijuana possession. Tillman was rumored to have told coach Mike Leach, "Duuuude, I must be high, because I had this crazy hallucination that we threw for 646 yards against Oklahoma State and lost." Pick: Red Raiders by 8

LSU at Kentucky. The saga of Rich Brooks' claim that his Kentucky team is in the class of Southern Cal, took a bewildering turn last weekend. His team looked totally unprepared against South Carolina, with poor play calling, uninspired defense and a porous offensive line ... actually, that sounds just like the Trojans. Pick: Tigers by 10

Colt, you've failed us for the last time. The one-time Heisman contender was injured and pulled from the Warriors' game against Utah State, paving the way for ...

Tyler Graunke, Brennan's backup, to throw for 246 yards and three touchdowns to deliver a Big Islander victory. Either Graunke or Brennan or the waterboy or the Warrior mascot should put up similarly huge numbers when Hawaii takes on San Jose State. Pick: Warriors by 19

Thanks to loyal reader Brad from NYC, who pointed out that all charges against Florida's Tony Joiner were dropped prior to the LSU game. And in case you were wondering, reports indicate Joiner and Tim Tebow did, in fact, kiss and make up ... Speaking of Florida, former USC tailback Emmanuel Moody explained his preseason transfer to Gainesville by saying, "They [the Gators] get their playmakers the ball." And from the looks of that second half in Baton Rouge, they also get LSU's playmakers the ball ... Nick Saban turned heads by suggesting teams such as South Florida use lax academic requirements to admit athletes. In a related story, the University of Alabama has accepted an invitation to join the Ivy League; the Tide's backfield full of Rhodes Scholars will open next season on the road at defending champion Princeton ... If you think it's been fun so far, just imagine how much wackier this season of upsets will be when Cincinnati plays Kansas in the BCS championship game.

"We didn't tackle well today but we made up for it by not blocking." -- John McKay, former USC coach