Another week, another round of fixtures around Europe, another crop of memes and funnies to dissect.
That's it. That's the intro. Let's get to the jokes already.
Daniel James' Celebration
Yeah, I mean you'd already seen the picture in the header image, but you don't need a second excuse to see it, do you?
I mean, its world-class memery. This is Manchester United we're talking about. Going up against Crystal Palace. Grabbing an 89th-minute equaliser. Crystal Palace. Equaliser.
Divock Origi scored the goal that sealed the Champions League trophy and jogged to the corner flag. Daniel James scores an equaliser against Crystal Palace and did the Mbappe celebration in front of the Man Utd supporters only to go on and lose the game. I can’t breathe.— - (@AnfieldRd96) August 24, 2019
Yes, he's young. Yes, he's been highly impressive. Yes, he should've known better. Yes, it's hilarious. And the before and after pic? Well, that's the cherry on top.
Antoine Griezmann's Glitter
Ahh, yes, another celebration, this one not so laden with schadenfreude as just pure, well, bemusement?
After scoring a great goal on his home debut, Antoine Griezmann went to the sidelines, and plucked from a pre-ordained cup a handful of red and blue glitter which, yeah, he threw in the air. Cos that's what people do these days.
It was, of course, an homage to the great Lebron James. It was also, of course, an attempt to generate memes and gifs and viral things.
Why is Griezmann throwing up a handful of glitter as his celebration? Is he trying to make a GIF or something?— Scott Saunders (@_scottsaunders) August 25, 2019
Griezmann celebrated throwing glitter into the air.— ℒ𝓊𝓀𝒶🌹❁ (@RM_Modric10) August 25, 2019
He is really a meme
And I guess it worked. Just for the wrong reasons? Or are there no wrong reasons these days? Is it ALL 4 tha GRAM? Well, Lionel Messi and Luis Suarez seemed to enjoy it, so that's some high-quality engagement right off the bat IRL.
There was even a forensic disection of where the glitter came from and how he got it onto the pitch on Spanish TV...
Neymar Transfer Trauma
Neymaris still a Paris Saint-Germain player. He still doesn't want to be. He still wants to rejoin Barcelona. Barcelona still want him. They still won't stump up an offer that PSG deem acceptable. They still dream variations of these deals up daily.
It has been a long and arduous journey, and this play on THAT painfully playful ice cream bloke captures the trauma perfectly.
Arsenal. Need I say more? The Gunners, once again, went to a top-six rival with 'renewed' 'spirit' and, once again, got rolled over. Cue, well, a lot of this.
Because, you know, it did.
Little did we know, however, that the Gunners had actually lost this particular clash before they'd even started, thanks to the heinous efforts of one fan.
Now, last week, we were all for the Mateo Guendouzi-David Luiz memiverse. But this is about 10 steps too far. This is egregious. Hair Force One. Courtmarshall the ****.
Here at Funnies HQ, we are committed to providing you with the latest developments in VAR's ongoing deployment across Europe. It's a noble, noble pursuit, and one we do not take lightly.
Which is why, after first telling you that in the Premier League's VARian handbook there is a clause claiming players who enter the VAR room - which is permanently stationed in Stockley Park, 13 miles from the nearest PL ground - will receive a red card, we offer you this exceptional story.
In Greece, they not only welcome players (presumably?), but food, and loads of it, all the time, during games, but especially when the cameras are on them. Don't let the Saganaki get cold, lads.