Stu White
Saturday May 17th, 2014

This past Thursday, 17-year-old Marcel Fernandes Filho had his world record for speed texting officially confirmed by the folks at Guinness.

Filho, who used a Fleksy keyboard to set the mark, typed the following 25-word message, with correct punctuation and zero spelling errors, in 18.19 seconds: "The razor-toothed piranhas of the genera Serrasalmus and Pygocentrus are the most ferocious freshwater fish in the world. In reality they seldom attack a human."

Pretty impressive, right? WRONG. Back in my day, we didn't have fancy touch-screen phones and beautiful typing interfaces. We had flip phones with sticky keys, or those incomparably dorky phones with slide-out keyboards. Filho wouldn't last a second in my texting generation. It was a different time then, I'll tell you what. Now plz gt off my lwn, yng ppl >:-(

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