Quick Slants: A nod to the Nicktator
I don't know about you, but I found it utterly impossible to resist the stray "devil went down to Georgia" reference when
It's no secret the infamous "Nicktator" has been a magnet for cheap punch lines ever since swimming away from his contract with the Miami Dolphins before last season. You could argue the fuel from Saban's two-timing tactics has allowed Quick Slants to thrive for the better part of a year. We've chewed through Saban zingers like Kobayashi at a buffet. From jokes about
Though that might all be true -- heck, it probably is -- one simple fact has trumped us: The guy can flat out coach.
Saturday night, between the hedges, Saban was at his absolute finest. Amid all the poppycock of Georgia's "Blackout," throwback jerseys and goofy
And that's what Saban does to an opponent. That's how he beats you. That's why he's the most powerful coach in sports,
So while Georgia was caught flat-footed by the Crimson Tide's unexpected surge, it should come as no surprise that one of Saban's teams is again causing a stir and forcing its way into the national championship picture.
Perhaps the truth is that Saban is actually some kind of God. In that case, it looks like I'm headed to hell.
Let's just ask the obvious: How in the name of
How exactly does something like this happen? While it's not fair to speculate, we should at least consider the possibility that USC was confused by playing a rare Thursday night game. Perhaps the Trojans thought they had joined the Big East and choked accordingly. Just a thought.
In losing to Navy and becoming the Midshipmen's first ranked victim of the since 1985, Wake Forest solidified a belief most college football fans should come to accept by season's end: The best way to make the ACC look formidable is by banning its teams from non-conference play. Just let them fight one another tooth and nail so it looks like they're playing in a highly-competitive conference.
It's just not a good conference. South Florida blew away N.C. State by 41. Unranked Maryland beat Clemson. Duke (!) beat Virginia by 28. Now would be a great time to go ahead and revoke the ACC's "BCS Conference" card and give it to a more deserving entity. You know, like the WAC or the MAC or the SEC West.
Fact: BYU isn't slated to play its first opponent with a top 25 ranking
Fact: BYU's first four wins came against unranked titans Northern Iowa, Washington, UCLA and Wyoming!
Fact: BYU is ranked seventh in the most recent
Ah yes, here's the beauty of college football, and specifically the magic of
1. More surprising season:
2. Better conference: Big East or
3. Better Fox show:
4. Better Clausen hair: Long or
5. More underrated exercise: Push-ups or
6. Better Nintendo character:
7. Better stadium novelty: Everyone wearing the same color or
8. More frustrating video game:
10. More overrated top 10 team:
"I think you should put Oregon quarterbacks on the
That's an interesting theory you've got there, David. Trying to curse a curse. My fear, though, is that a marraige between such fierce occult forces would only create a more powerful hex in the college football community. It would be like crossing the streams in Ghostbusters -- we'd potentially risk setting the Oregon Quarterback Curse loose and have to watch it destroy the knees of all