Gary Gramling

Plus, tight ends to target, a couple of face-melting sleepers, why this is the year for DeVante Parker oh my God I swear it’s true, how to DOMINATE!!! your draft, why your fantasy football playoff system is dumb, and why you have to stop asking other people to set your lineup for you

Want to sound like you know what you’re talking about when The Royal Wedding goes down on Saturday? This probably won’t help, but here it is anyway

Also, why something will have gone very wrong if Baker Mayfield is not starting Week 1, Shaquem Griffin lands in the right place at the right spot, a rough couple nights for the Cowboys, hooray for the Titans, a reminder to never tweet, and the comedy stylings of John Dorsey. Plus—no musical guest—but the jerk dog from Go, Dog. Go!

Also, why Sunday feels like a Rex Burkhead kind of day, the helmet catch through the eyes of a pass-rusher who almost sacked Eli, the NFL needs to capitalize on the new breed of rivalries, Baha Men can’t catch a break, and the almost 17 best comedy sketches ever. Plus, musical guest: Foo Fighters!

Also, remembering when Chad Henne was supposed to be Jacksonville’s starter, the Vikings’ bizarre drafting, Mike Vrabel goes to Tennessee, and the solution for the Steelers that is not the dumb ‘fire Tomlin’ stuff. Plus, musical guest Living Colour!

Also, the Patriots and Titans played a football game! All the action from an unforgettable weekend of playoff football

Also, the Eagles outcoach everyone, new play-callers coming for Cam Newton and (eventually) Russell Wilson, Reuben Foster reminds us that marijuana use actually is a legitimate red flag (because of dumb rules), the Thomas Davis farewell tour, and the unnecessary rush to hire head coaches. Plus, musical guest The Rentals!

Also, the Chiefs end up where they probably should have ended up, the Falcons D catches fire, John Lynch makes the 49ers exactly what the Browns wanted to be, the Raiders’ obsession with the past, and all the overreactions to that Patriots story. Plus, musical guest Neil Young!

Plus, Frank Gore goes for 100 again, the Titans finally get that ninth win, and the Bucs get fired up even with nothing to play for

Also, the looming Odell Beckham Jr. contract drama, Davante Adams got paid but a couple Packers veterans won’t, Bucs make the right move in keeping Koetter, Browns should be an easy sell for QB prospects, and let’s take it easy on the James Harrison legacy stuff. Plus, musical guest, Wolfgang Amadeus Mozart!