By Brett Smiley
January 12, 2014

Putting It Blountly

Saturday's divisional playoff games were ruled by running backs as the Patriots' Blount Mode (24/166/4 TDs) and Seahawks' Beast Mode (28/140/2 TDs) carried their respective offenses to victory. (The defenses helped, too.)

Before the Seahawks-Saints game, Jimmy Graham got mouthy with 'Hawks linebacker Bruce Irvin (video here), then Graham got silenced during the game ... Saints punter Thomas Morestead took a long snap to the junk ... Similar trouble for Earl Thomas, who made the international gonad collision signal ... Thomas and Michael Crabtree are wearing retro Air Jordan VI cleats for the playoffs … Two Saints players shared a jacket ... This week on Rob Ryan's play sheet: Supersonics '80s perm sensation Jack Sikma ... Seattle's 12th Man brought plenty of Skittles, which proved a crucial part of Pete Carroll's game plan ... Doug Baldwin fell hard ... FOX's "fish cam" is exactly what it sounds like.

Tough day for the punter in New England, too: Pats punter Ryan Allen got rocked on his attempt to save a errant long snap (that everyone but CBS analyst Dan Dierdorf knew would serve the Pats best as a safety), though backup punter and full-time kicker Stephen Gostkowski did just fine ... After the safety goof, Dierdorf bid a heartfelt farewell ... A referee gave Blount a pretty fierce talkin' to ... A photographer was doing something here ... Charles Barkley crashed the Patriots locker room after the game, because he can … As if it weren't raining hard enough at Gillette Stadium yesterday, Andrew Luck fired an incredible mass of spittle with the intensity you'd expect from the fiery competitor.

They Killed Percy

Percy Harvin had such a rough afternoon that FOX needed a dedicated camera for the oft-injured receiver's dislodged mouthpiece. First, Harvin took a helmet-to-helmet shot from safety Rafael Bush that sent him to the locker room. He grimaced but got cleared to return, only to get shoved around like this, and then left the game for good after this finishing move. Stay tuned to see if the NFL's version of Kenny from South Park will be back from the concussion for next week's episode.

Shaq and the New Jersey Devil Cruising on a Zamboni

I really wish they had bought matching shirts that say "WE"RE BAAAAAD MEN!" (H/T Deadspin). That said, Shaq didn't disappoint with his attire: Here he is squeezed into the Ponikarovsky jersey he wore when dropping the puck Saturday night.

Cheerleaders of the Week

Dear Diary,

On January 12, my editor e-mailed me and said there were gorgeous cheerleader twin sisters for the weekend edition of Clicks. It made me feel things I've never felt before.



Meet Kirsten and Kristen Hardy, University of Houston early childhood education majors and cheerleaders for the Charlotte Bobcats.

Worst date I've ever been on: When I was about 19, I went to the movies and my date fell asleep in the theatre! Yes, snores were included. —Kristen 

My friends would be surprised to know that: I have to eat exactly three cubes of ice every night before bed. —Kirsten

Coolest person that follows me on Twitter: Jimmy King from Michigan's Fab Five. —Kristen 

Celebrity crush: Drake. I've been in love with him since he was Jimmy on Degrassi. —Kirsten

To see more of Kirsten and Kristen, check out the full gallery.

Speaking of Drake

The Canadian crooner appeared at the Raptors "Drake Night" and introduced the hometown squad before settling into courtside seats  the assistant coaching position. Also, the Bobcats play the Raptors on January 20. Thank me later, Kirsten.

Hall of Fame Knucklehead

If you don't already regard the MLB Hall of Fame voting process as glorified buffoonery, let me introduce you to the BBWAA voter (a retired sports cartoonist) who cast a ballot for Bonds, Clemens, and McGwire, but refused to vote for Craig Biggio on account of cheating -- for allegedly making no effort to avoid getting hit by pitches.

January Disease Grips New England

Already reeling from the reoccurrence of seasonal playoff fatigue, Patriots fans' suffering will now last at least one more inconvenient week.

(Really) Ill-Advised Teaser

I'm not sure what's more enjoyable: Winning, or being right. Last week's successful teaser got me to .500 and restored my ego, so I'm sticking with the Nothing to Lose Chargers. They're nine-point dogs on the road against divisional foe Denver, whom San Diego already beat at Mile High this year. Insert the narrative here about Manning in the postseason. The Chargers will commit to the run with or without Ryan Mathews and play a ball-control game (i.e. keep away from Manning). Above all: #BOLO. But first, I'm going to quote Evanescence in the and say I'm Going Under (you know you know it) on the Niners/Panthers game. No brain surgery there: The line is at about 42, which is higher than I expected (they combined for 19 this year in a game, although sans Crabtree), and these are two nasty defenses and O's that run first. So we've got: SD +15, CAR/SF u48. BOLO!!!

Odds & Ends

Extra Mustard published a lot of articles this week. You may have missed some … Rangers pitcher Derek Holland got injured when his boxer hit him on a staircase ... EPL announcers crushed a Crystal Palace player after his terrible penalty shot miss ... The Red Hot Chili Peppers to join Bruno Mars at Super Bowl halftime ... Burglars took $250,000 in cash from DeSean "Maybe Try a Bank Account" Jackson's home ... CBS's Allie LaForce became popular on Twitter yesterday ... Brutal elbow by Anthony Davis.

One of the Craziest Goals You'll Ever See

Swedish team was a no-show for the face-off, then this happened.  (H/T Puck Daddy).

Holyfield-Once-Punched-a-Pregnant-Horse-In-the-Face Video of the Day

I can't explain the inexplicable. Let The Real Deal try. (H/T BSO)

Oh, it's just the Cowboys Cheerleaders with a Hula Hoop-Mounted GoPro

You're gonna like what you see. (H/T TBL)

Follow me on Twitter and send tips to basmiley [at] gmail [dot] com. If you want even more, check out out ’70s glam rocker Brett Smiley and politician Brett Smiley, who’s currently running for mayor of Providence, Rhode Island.

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