Why does the Cubs’ new clubhouse look like a cruise ship nightclub?

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The Chicago Cubs unveiled their new clubhouse to the media on Tuesday, and it certainly looks way more club than house.

Seriously, what is this monstrosity? It looks like the seedy, fifth-deck nightclub on a cruise ship where a bunch of 22-year-olds pound piña coladas.

And why is this bear staring at everyone?

The clubhouse-in-the-round. pic.twitter.com/Epj9QJHunE
— The Athletic Chicago (@TheAthleticCHI) April 12, 2016

Watch the colors change. Trippy, right? pic.twitter.com/vvB74xstQA
— The Athletic Chicago (@TheAthleticCHI) April 12, 2016

Wouldn’t these lights get annoying after a while? I’d feel like I’m stuck in a casino.

I'm going to ask these jerseys how they feel and how much fun they're having. pic.twitter.com/13bwH49sbj
— The Athletic Chicago (@TheAthleticCHI) April 12, 2016

I mean, come on.

Theo lit up the Cubs' celebration room on the tour. Music, fog machines, lights and a disco ball. Pressure won't ever exceed the pleasure.
— Chris Emma (@CEmma670) April 12, 2016

No, for sure, a fog machine is a totally practical thing for a professional sports team’s clubhouse to include. And it’s only a matter of time before someone gets injured because they went too hard when the disco ball dropped.

Whatever, I’m sure turning their clubhouse into nightclub will be great juju for the Cubs, who definitely aren’t the type of organization who need to worry about upsetting any kind of spirits.

– Rohan Nadkarni