If you were surprised by Thursday morning's trade that sent White Sox ace Jose Quintana to the Cubs for a four-player prospect package, you weren't alone. The news dropped out of nowhere on a baseball-less day during the All-Star break, and in a truly unexpected twist in our social media era, the report came not from one of the game's more plugged-in reporters like Ken Rosenthal or Jon Heyman, but from the teams themselves, who bothtweeted out the news.
If you can believe this Reddit post, though, two people can lay claim to being the first non-team officials to know about the deal thanks to a well-placed insider. And because this is Reddit, of course both of the guys who posted about the then-trade rumor have butt-themed usernames.
Yes, "KatyPerrysBootyHole" and "wetbutt23" (not exactly Woodward and Bernstein there) managed to scoop everyone on a deal so secret that, at one point, White Sox president Rick Hahn and Cubs president Theo Epstein were negotiating it while hidden behind a baseball display at the All-Star Game Fanfest in Miami. And this newsbreaking duo did it thanks to wetbutt23, KPBH's aforementioned "friend who's [sic] brother's friend works for the Cubs," with both spilling the beans on r/whitesox late last night.
Anyway, despite being pressed for proof by skeptical Redditors, both KPBH and wetbutt were proven right, which makes me think that they're actually Hahn and Epstein having a butt-related laugh.