Traina Thoughts: From Pie To Gravy, We've Ranked the 10 Best Thanksgiving Foods
1. We're two days away from Thanksgiving and you're knee-deep in fantasizing about that gluttonous meal you will devour in between watching football on Thursday. In honor of the occasion, we're power ranking 10 of the most popular foods people eat on the big day. Share your thoughts on the list by hitting me up on Twitter.
10) Cranberry sauce: This jiggly gel-like substance is vile and shouldn't be on the list, but people serve this for some reason and I needed 10 items, so here we are.
9) Green Bean casserole: You throw fried onions on top of something, it automatically becomes good.
8) Turkey: If you're being honest, you will admit that turkey is bland -- even if you deep fry the son of a gun. But eating turkey on Thanksgiving is the ultimate tradition, and, more importantly, you can douse it in gravy and then it becomes tasty.
7) Yams/Sweet Potatoes: If you make it into a casserole with brown sugar, cinnamon and walnuts or pecans, this can be No. 1 on the list. If they remain plain, this is where they belong.
6) Biscuits: Hopefully your host is nice enough to serve them hot.
5) Booze: This can really occupy any of the top five spots, depending on the dysfunction level of your family.
4) Gravy: If your host serves the canned variety, this goes to No. 9 (and you should go somewhere else on Thanksgiving). But when it's homemade, it's a thing of beauty.
3) Stuffing: Pro tip from an Italian -- throw bits of sausage in there. You haven't lived until you've had your stuffing this way.
2) Pie (Any): I'll now rank the pies within the ranking of the foods: 1) Pecan; 2) Sweet potato; 3) Pumpkin; 4) Chocolate; 5) Apple.
1) Mashed potatoes: The perfect food. People take mashed potatoes for granted. They also try to make their fancier than they need to be. Just make the smooth and load them up with butter and they are heaven on a plate.
2. Mike Francesa has finally decided to go out with a bang. The Sports Pope, who's final show on WFAN in New York, said on Monday he could manage the Yankees.
3. This hilarious video of a bus blocking a cameraman's view of the Georgia Dome went viral yesterday.
My fine colleagues at SI.com had some fun with that piece of footage and put together this great compilation.
4. Where did No. 80 go?!?!
5. Not only does Stephen Curry get all the perks that come with being a great basketball player, he also has things good at home where he is the taste tester for his wife, Ayesha.
6. Marshawn Lynch gave a very NSFW and impossible-to-understand postgame interview after the Raiders lost to the Patriots on Sunday.
7. Astros third baseman Alex Bregman sent one hell of an update yesterday on this tweet I had sent out a couple of weeks ago.
8. RANDOM WRESTLING VIDEO OF THE DAY: During the 1989 Survivor Series, a slew of WWF superstars revealed what they were thankful for in the most '80s wrestling kind of way.
Traina Thoughts is the best of the Internet, plus musings by SI.com writer, Jimmy Traina. Get the link to a new Traina's Thoughts each day by following on Twitter and liking on Facebook. Catch up on previous editions of Traina Thoughts right here. And check out Jimmy Traina's weekly podcast, "Off The Board."
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BONUS ITEM: Go away, Joe Morgan.
