Public enemy No. 2
In a story that could have been Season 2 of American Vandal, police in New Jersey have arrested a man they believe to be responsible for the piles of human feces left on a local high school football field and track “on a daily basis.”
The poopetrator, it turns out, was the superintendent of another school district. Thomas Tramaglini was arrested before 6 a.m. Monday and charged with lewdness, littering and defecating in public. He has taken paid leave from his $147,504-a-year job.
Police are still searching for a motive.
A fond farewell (?) to Ichiro
I honestly don’t believe Ichiro is retiring from baseball—he’ll probably go to Japan and play for eight more years—but we’ve probably seen the last of him in MLB after he was pushed aside by the Mariners yesterday. You don’t need me to tell you how great Ichiro was—I’ll let Jack Dickey do that instead—though I would like to take this time to share my favorite (slightly NSFW) Ichiro video.
What else did you expect?
LeBron James did the damn thing again. He’s amazing. It’s normal. I can’t think of anything to say that I haven’t already said in the past two weeks.
May the fourth be with you
Star Wars and Sports
A Villanova fan dressed as Darth Vader supports his team during its Final Four game against Oklahoma on April 2, 2016 at NRG Stadium in Houston.
The San Jose Sharks host Star Wars Night on March 24, 2016 at the SAP Center in San Jose, Calif.
New England Revolution supporters display a Star Wars themed TIFO before the start of their game against DC United on March 12, 2016 at Gillette Stadium in Foxborough, Mass.
Dallas Mavericks guard Raymond Felton is greeted by teammates and stormtroopers during team introductions for their game against the Phoenix Suns on Jan. 31, 2016 at American Airlines Center in Dallas.
San Jose Sharks defenseman Brent Burns wears a Chewbacca mask as he competes in the Breakaway Challenge during the NHL All-Star Skill Competition on Jan. 30, 2016 at Bridgestone Arena in Nashville.
A Buffalo Bills fan wears a Darth Vader mask during a game against the Dallas Cowboys on Dec. 27, 2015 at Ralph Wilson Stadium in Orchard Park, N.Y.
Cole Miller and Jim Alers face off with lightsabers during the UFC weigh-in on Dec. 18, 2015 at the Orange County Convention Center in Orlando.
Pittsburgh Penguins fans wear Star Wars masks during a game against the Boston Bruins on Dec. 18, 2015 at Consol Energy Center in Pittsburgh.
Brooklyn Nets center Brook Lopez poses with Star Wars characters before a game against the Orlando Magic on Dec. 14, 2015 at Barclays Center in Brooklyn, N.Y.
Portland Trail Blazers point guard Damian Lillard looks back at R2-D2 before a game against the New Orleans Pelicans on Dec. 14, 2015 at the Moda Center Arena in Portland, Ore.
Detroit Pistons dancers celebrate "Star Wars Night" during the game against the Indiana Pacers on Dec. 12, 2015 at The Palace of Auburn Hills, Mich.
A Lake Erie Monsters Hockey Girl cheers on the ice following the AHL game against the Chicago Wolves during "Star Wars Night" on Dec. 12, 2015 at Quicken Loans Arena in Cleveland.
The Philadelphia 76ers Dancer perform during "Star Wars Night" in a game against the Detroit Pistons on Dec. 11, 2015 at Wells Fargo Center in Philadelphia
A stormtrooper dances with the New Orleans Pelicans dance team during a game against the Washington Wizards on Dec. 11, 2015 at Smoothie King Center in New Orleans.
Seattle Seahawks defensive end Michael Bennett poses as a jedi during a photo shoot on Dec. 9, 2015 in Renton, Wash.
Anaheim Ducks Power Players tend to the ice while dressed as Princess Leia during "Star Wars Night" in the game against the Tampa Bay Lightning on Dec. 2, 2015 at Honda Center in Anaheim, Calif.
A U.S. Naval Academy midshipman is dressed like a stormtrooper during the football game between Navy and SMU on Nov. 14, 2015 in Annapolis, Md.
Members of the UNLV Rebels marching band perform dressed in Star Wars costumes before the team's game against the Boise State Broncos on Oct. 31, 2015 at Sam Boyd Stadium in Las Vegas.
A Chicago Cubs fan dressed as Boba Fett stands in front of Wrigley Field before Game Four of the National League Divisional Series against the St. Louis Cardinals on Oct. 13, 2015 in Chicago.
Miami Dolphins fans calling themselves the Fintroopers pose in their stormtrooper costumes during an NFL fan rally on Oct. 3, 2015 in Trafalgar Square prior to the game against the New York Jets at Wembley Stadium in London.
Houston Astros mascot Orbit dresses as Yoda during "Star Wars Day" before the Houston Astros game against the Minnesota Twins on Sept. 6, 2015 at Minute Maid Park in Houston.
Brad Meltzer and Florida Marlins mascot Billy the Marlin get into the spirit of "Star Wars Night" before the game against the New York Mets on Sept. 4, 2015 at Marlins Park in Miami.
Colorado Rockies mascot Dinger poses with characters on "Star Wars Night" prior to the game against the New York Mets on Aug. 22, 2015 at Coors Field in Denver.
Kansas City Royals pitcher Jeremy Guthrie and mascot Sluggerrr pose with characters on "Star Wars Day" prior to the game against the Chicago White Sox on Aug. 9, 2015 at Kauffman Stadium in Kansas City.
The Washington Nationals scoreboard dispays the pitching matchup between Los Angeles Dodgers starting pitcher Zack Greinke and Nats starting pitcher Max Scherzer on "Star Wars Day" on July 19, 2015 at Nationals Park in Washington, D.C.
Los Angeles Dodgers right fielder Yasiel Puig watches the Washington Nationals Presidents Race mascots dressed as Star Wars characters during the game on July 19, 2015 at Nationals Park in Washington, D.C.
Washington Nationals mascots Screech and Little Screech dress as Star Wars characters before the game against the Los Angeles Dodgers on July 19, 2015 at Nationals Park in Washington, D.C.
Todd Frazier poses with Darth Vader before the game against the San Francisco Giants on May 15, 2015 at Great American Ball Park in Cincinnati, Ohio.
Cincinnati Reds mascot Rosie Red waves before the game against the San Francisco Giants on May 15, 2015 at Great American Ball Park in Cincinnati, Ohio.
Los Angeles Angels pitcher Hector Santiago poses with R2-D2 on "Star Wars Night" before the Angels game against the Oakland Athletics on April 20, 2015 at Angel Stadium in Anaheim, Calif.
Members of the Los Angeles Angels Strike Force wear Princess Leia hair on "Star Wars Night" during the Angels game against the Oakland Athletics on April 20, 2015 at Angel Stadium in Anaheim, Calif.
Magic Johnson poses with Darth Vader and stormtroopers before the Los Angeles Dodgers game against the Seattle Mariners on April 14, 2015 at Dodger Stadium in Los Angeles.
Darth Vader and a stormtrooper pose for a photo during "Star Wars Night" prior to the Ottawa Senators game against the Florida Panthers on March 29, 2015 at Canadian Tire Centre in Ottawa, Canada.
A Dallas Mavericks fan poseswith Star Wars costume clad fans before the Mavs game against the Los Angeles Clippers during "Star Wars Night" on Feb. 9, 2015 at American Airlines Center in Dallas.
A Denver Broncos fan dressed in an orange Darth Vader costume stands and cheers during the Broncos game against the Oakland Raiders on Dec. 28, 2014 at Sports Authority Field at Mile High in Denver.
An Oakland Raiders fan dressed as Darth Vader supports his team during their game against the Buffalo Bills on Dec. 21, 2014 at O.co Coliseum in Oakland, Calif.
A Michigan Wolverines fan dressed as a stormtrooper attends the team's football game against the Indiana Hoosiers on Nov. 1, 2014 at Michigan Stadium in Ann Arbor, Mich.
An Edmonton Eskimos fan dressed up as Chewbacca cheers on the team during their CFL game against Saskatchewan Roughriders on Sept. 26, 2014 at Commonwealth Stadium in Edmonton, Canada.
Atlanta Braves mascot Homer walks around the field during "Star Wars Night" prior to the Braves game against the New York Mets on Sept. 19, 2014 at Turner Field in Atlanta.
Atlanta Braves first baseman Freddie Freeman appears dressed as Han Solo on the jumbotron during the Braves game against the New York Mets on "Star Wars Night" on Sept. 19, 2014 at Turner Field in Atlanta.
Darth Vader points to fans as he walks by Seattle Mariners first baseman Logan Morrison after throwing out the ceremonial first pitch before the Mariners game against the Texas Rangers on Sept. 5, 2014 at Rangers Ballpark in Arlington, Texas.
San Francisco Giants mascot Lou Seal dresses up as R2-D2 before the Giants game against the Milwaukee Brewers on Aug. 31, 2014 at AT&T Park in San Francisco.
Chicago White Sox first baseman Paul Konerko poses with Darth Vader and a stormtrooper before the White Sox game against the Cleveland Indians during "Star Wars Night' on Aug. 29, 2014 at U.S. Cellular Field in Chicago.
Chewbacca hugs Chicago White Sox catcher Adrian Nieto after throwing out the ceremonial first pitch before the White Sox game against the Cleveland Indians during "Star Wars Night' on Aug. 29, 2014 at U.S. Cellular Field in Chicago.
A Chicago White Sox fan wears a Yoda mask during the White Sox game against the Cleveland Indians during "Star Wars Night' on Aug. 29, 2014 at U.S. Cellular Field in Chicago.
Darth Vader and Mark Duplass wait to throw out the ceremonial first pitch before the game between the Chicago Cubs and the San Francisco Giants on "Star Wars Night" on Aug. 20, 2014 at Wrigley Field in Chicago.
The Portland Sea Dogs head to the field in Chewbacca-themed uniforms during their game against the Richmond Flying Squirrels as they celebrate "Star Wars Night" on Aug. 16, 2014 at Hadlock Field in Portland, Maine.
The Denver Outlaws take the field in Rebel Alliance uniforms for their Major League Lacrosse game against the Ohio Machine on May 4, 2014 at Sports Authority Field at Mile High in Denver.
Cincinnati Reds mascot Mr. Red pretends to be choked by Darth Vader prior to the Reds game against the Milwaukee Brewers on May 2, 2014 at Great American Ballpark in Cincinnati.
A stormtrooper looks on between periods of the Florida Panthers game against the Dallas Stars during "Star Wars Night" on April 6, 2014 at the BB&T Center in Sunrise, Fla.
A Florida Gators fan holds a sign depicting Chris Walker as a Star Wars Jedi character before the Gators game against the Missouri Tigers on Feb. 4, 2014 at the Stephen C. O'Connell Center in Gainesville, Fla.
A University of Miami fan and his daughter wear Darth Vader masks painted in UM colors during the Hurricanes game against the Wake Forest Demon Deacons on Oct. 26, 2013 at Sun Life Stadium in Miami.
LSU Tigers mascot Mike the Tiger entertains the crowd dressed as Darth Vader during a game against the Furman Paladins on Oct. 26, 2013 at Tiger Stadium in Baton Rouge, La.
Tampa Bay Rays DH Luke Scott wears a Chewbacca mask as he high-fives manager Joe Maddon after the team's 5-4 win in 18 innings against the Baltimore Orioles on Sept. 20, 2013 at Tropicana Field in St. Petersburg, Fla.
Boba Fett throws out the ceremonial first pitch before a game between the Oakland Athletics and Minnesota Twins on Sept. 20, 2013 at O.co Coliseum in Oakland, Calif.
Oakland Athletics mascot Stumper dressed as Yoda before the A's game against the Minnesota Twins on Sept. 20, 2013 at O.co Coliseum in Oakland, Calif.
Detroit Tigers mascot Paws poses for a photo with Star Wars characters prior to the "Star Wars Night" game between the Tigers and Kansas City Royals on Sept. 14, 2013 at Comerica Park in Detroit.
A University of Miami fan wears a white Darth Vader mask during the Hurricanes game against the Florida Gators on Sept. 7, 2013 at Sun Life Stadium in Miami.
Fans dressed as members of the Star Wars Cantina Band sit in the stands during a game between the Arizona Diamondbacks and the Cincinnati Reds on June 23, 2013 at Chase Field in Phoenix, Ariz.
Toledo Mud Hens pitcher Jose Alvarez, wearing his Star Wars Chewbacca-themed jersey, delivers a pitch during a Triple-A International League minor league game against the Charlotte Knights on May 4, 2013 at Fifth Third Field in Toledo, Ohio.
Philadelphia Flyers goalie Ilya Bryzgalov donned a Star Wars themed mask during the 2012-13 NHL season.
Atlanta Braves catcher Evan Gattis autographs a lightsaber bat for Darth Vader before a spring training game on March 15, 2013 at Champion Stadium at ESPN Wide World of Sports Complex in Lake Buena Vista, Fla.
A member of the crowd dressed as Darth Vader holds up a sign during game four of the Commonwealth Bank One Day International Series between Australia and the West Indies on Feb. 8, 2013 at Sydney Cricket Ground.
Billy Dee Williams is flanked by stormtroopers and R2-D2 while dribbling a basketball before the Detroit Pistons game against the Atlanta Hawks on "Star Wars Night" on Jan. 4, 2013 at the Palace of Auburn Hills, Mich.
Novak Djokovic wears a Darth Vader mask and waves to the crowd as he arrives on court for his match against Sam Querrey on Oct. 31, 2012 at the Paris Tennis Masters tournament.
A red stormtrooper stands guard before the Atlanta Hawks game against the Golden State Warriors on Feb. 29, 2012 at Philips Arena in Atlanta.
MMA fighter Amanda Lucas, daughter of Star Wars visionary George Lucas, poses with Darth Vader and several stormtroopers after earning her first MMA championship on Feb. 18, 2012 at Deep 57 in Japan.
Darth Maul skates on the rink during a promotion between periods of a game between the San Jose Sharks and the Tampa Bay Lightning on Feb. 16, 2012 at the Tampa Bay Times Forum.
Houston Texans themed stormtroopers pose for a photo outside Reliant Stadium prior to the Texans hosting the Cincinnati Bengals during their 2012 AFC Wild Card Playoff game on Jan. 7, 2012 in Houston.
Boise State Broncos fans dressed as stormtroopers cheer in the stands during the team's 48-21 victory over the UNLV Rebels on Nov. 5, 2011 at Sam Boyd Stadium in Las Vegas.
A Seattle Seahawks fan dressed as Chewbacca dances during the Seahawks game against the Cincinnati Bengals on Oct. 30, 2011 at Century Link Field in Seattle.
St. Louis Cardinals pitcher Chris Carpenter laughs as he stands with Darth Vader before the National Anthem prior to the Cardinals game against the Houston Astros on Sept. 26, 2011 on "Star Wars Night" at Minute Maid Park in Houston.
Houston Astros left fielder J.D. Martinez poses with Darth Vader, celebrating "Star Wars Night" before the Astros game against the St. Louis Cardinals on Sept. 26, 2011 at Minute Maid Park in Houston.
Arizona Diamondbacks mascot Baxter dresses as an Ewok on "Star Wars Night" during the D-Backs game against the San Francisco Giants on Sept. 25, 2011 at Chase Field in Phoenix.
Arizona Diamondbacks "Legend" Mark Grace is stopped by Darth Vader on "Star Wars Night" during the D-Backs game against the San Francisco Giants on Sept. 25, 2011 at Chase Field in Phoenix.
Florida Marlins catcher John Baker poses with Darth Vader and a clone trooper before the Marlins game against the Atlanta Braves on Sept. 20, 2011 at Sun Life Stadium in Miami.
New York Mets center fielder Angel Pagan passes two stormtroopers before the start of the Mets game against the Atlanta Braves on Sept. 16, 2011 at Turner Field in Atlanta.
New York Mets pitcher Ryota Igarashi wields a lightsaber against a fan dressed as Darth Vader prior to the Mets game against the Washington Nationals on Sept. 13, 2011 at Citi Field in New York.
San Francisco Giants mascot Lou Seal poses with stormtroopers before the Giants game against the Arizona Diamondbacks, as a part of "Star Wars Day" on Sept. 4, 2011 at AT&T Park in San Francisco.
San Diego Padres relief pitchers walk to the bullpen wearing Star Wars themed backpacks prior to the Padres game against the Arizona Diamondbacks on Aug. 28, 2011 at Chase Field in Phoenix.
Fans of Oklahoma City Thunder forward Serge Ibaka dress as Wookies for Game 2 of the second round of the NBA playoffs between the Thunder and the Memphis Grizzlies on May 3, 2011 at Oklahoma City Arena.
The Phoenix Suns dancers perform in Princess Leia-themed outfits during the Suns game against the Sacramento Kings on Feb. 13, 2011 at US Airways Center in Phoenix.
Mississippi State students wear clone trooper and stormtrooper masks during the team's football game against Alcorn State on Oct. 2, 2010 at Davis Wade Stadium in Starkville, Miss.
San Diego Padres closer Heath Bell (left) wears a clone trooper helmet and poses for a photo with other clone troopers prior to the Padres game against the Cincinnati Reds on Sept. 24, 2010 at Petco Park in San Diego.
Michigan fans in the "Maize Rage" student section dress as Star Wars characters during the team's basketball game against Wisconsin on Feb. 6, 2010 at Crisler Arena in Ann Arbor, Michigan.
St. Louis Blues mascot Louie dresses as Darth Vader for "Star Wars Night" during the Blues game against the Colorado Avalanche on Dec. 7, 2009 at Scottrade Center in St. Louis.
The Stanford marching band drummers dressed as clone troopers perform before a game against Cal on Nov. 21, 2009 at Stanford Stadium in Stanford, Calif.
Darth Vader and stormtroopers join Florida Panthers mascot Stanley C. Panther on the ice as Vader drops the puck for the Buffalo Sabres' Craig Rivet and Panthers' Bryan McCabe on Oct. 21, 2009 at BankAtlantic Center in Sunrise, Florida.
Ottawa Senators goalie Martin Gerber donned a Darth Vader-themed mask during the 2008-09 NHL season.
LA Galaxy midfielder David Beckham and a clone trooper pose for photographers during pregame festivities of an MLS soccer match against DC United on Sept. 20, 2008 at The Home Depot Center in Los Angeles.
A runner dressed as a stormtrooper begins the London Marathon on April 13, 2008.
Darth Vader makes the honorary first pitch to Texas Rangers mascot Captain prior to the Rangers game against the Detroit Tigers on June 5, 2007 at The Ballpark in Arlington, Texas.
New York Islanders goalie Wade Dubielewicz donned a mask with Yoda on the back during the 2006-07 NHL season.
Hayden Christensen watches the Toronto Raptors mascot, dressed as a Sith, pick up a lightsaber during a time-out in the Raptors game against the Portland Trail Blazers on Dec. 10, 2006 at Air Canada Centre in Toronto.
Chewbacca throws out the ceremonial first pitch as Wicket the Ewok looks on before a game between the Florida Marlins and Washington Nationals on Aug. 22, 2006 at Sun Life Stadium in Miami.
Florida Marlins utility player Alfredo Amezaga is shown on the scoreboard as Yoda during his at-bat in the first inning against the Washington Nationals on Aug. 22, 2006 at Sun Life Stadium in Miami.
Washington Redskins wide receiver Antwaan Randle El poses with Darth Maul during the opening day of the month-long "Star Wars Weekends" fan festival on May 19, 2006 at the Disney-MGM Studios in Lake Buena Vista, Fla.
A Cincinnati Bengals fan dresses as a stormtrooper during the Bengals game against the Houston Texans on Oct. 2, 2005 at Paul Brown Stadium in Cincinnati.
George Lucas and Red Bull Formula One driver David Coulthard, standing between Lucas and Darth Vader, pose behind the Red Bull race car on May 20, 2005 in Monte Carlo, Monaco.
Philadelphia Eagles linebacker Dhani Jones poses with Darth Vader at the premiere of Star Wars Episode III: Revenge Of The Sith on May 12, 2005 at the Ziegfeld Theater in New York City.
Jeff Gordon poses with Darth Vader, Jango Fett, and stormtroopers prior to the Aaron's 499 on May 1, 2005 at Talladega Superspeedway in Alabama.
A Detroit Red Wings fan dressed in an Imperial Guard outfit cheers during the team's Stanley Cup celebration rally on June 17, 2002 in Detroit.
John Andretti drives the Cheerios/Star Wars Dodge Intrepid R/T during practice for the Coca-Cola 600 on May 23, 2002 at Lowe's Motor Speedway in Concord, N.C.
A New York Giants fan looks out at the other fans with his stormtrooper mask during the NFL Draft on April 21, 2001 at Madison Square Garden in New York City.
Minnesota Twins catcher Terry Steinbach and pitcher Joe Mays share the bench with the Twins newest Wookie prior to their game with the Seattle Mariners on July 24, 1999 at the Hubert H. Humphrey Metrodome in Minneapolis, Minn.
Jeff Gordon stands by his new Busch Grand National series car during a news conference to announce the Star Wars Episode I sponsorship for his team in the Carquest 300 race on May 26, 1999 in Concord, N.C.
Confession: I’ve never seen a single Star Wars movie.
Bits & Pieces
Lacrosse fight! ... Police are hoping to finally catch the Zodiac Killer by using new DNA technology. ... This guy in L.A. keeps ditching his Tinder dates and leaving them with pricey dinner bills. ... Here’s an interesting interview with Amar’e Stoudemire about how he managed his money when he first got to the NBA. ... This North Carolina student got accepted to 113 colleges and offered a total of $4.5 million in scholarships. ... Twitter did a stupid thing and now you should probably change your password.
No, Jose Calderon is not a secret billionaire
Here’s a tweet that’s been going viral (over 50,000 retweets and counting) that shows you can’t believe everything you read online.
Maybe it should have been obvious from the phrase “The Calderon brothers keep a very low profile” but these are not the same people.
Jose Fernando Calderon is the son of a Mexican beverage magnate. Jose Manuel Calderon is a Spanish basketball player. The basketball Calderon isn’t worth billions, but he’s still done quite well for himself. Thus far in his NBA career he’s made nearly $82 million, and that’s not counting his earnings in Spain before coming to North America.
Read this incredible Twitter thread
I promise it’s worth it.
Kristaps Porzingis always shoots his shot
Let’s settle this like gentlemen
Throw in Trea Turner and maybe we’re getting somewhere
I’m sorry, but if you’re a grown-ass man you shouldn’t go after a foul ball this aggressively
Before they were famous
I got a few emails when I first started from people upset that I mentioned pro wrestling the day after WrestleMania. (Like, seriously?) But I think even those people can appreciate this new video series from WWE in which they look at wrestlers before they made the big time. (The first in the series featured Seth Rollins.)
End your week with some science
A good song
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