The Knicks’ New Brand Consultant Had a Very Bad First Day on the Job

In Wednesday’s Hot Clicks: the Knicks’ newest hire falls flat on his face, A-Rod’s ridiculous golf bag and more.
Author:
Publish date:

Classic Knicks

The latest move by the Knicks to pull themselves out of the NBA’s basement involves hiring an advertising executive named Steve Stoute to rebrand the Knicks as cool, not only in the eyes of fans but also for prospective players. (Not coincidentally, this moves comes shortly after Kevin Durant said on New York’s biggest hip-hop station that the Knicks aren’t “cool.”)

It’s another instance of the Knicks putting a Band-Aid on an ax wound. Everyone outside Madison Square Garden knows the reason the Knicks aren’t perceived as cool or an attractive free-agency destination is because their owner is a moron who hires other morons and continues to run the worst organization in the NBA. 

But Stoute’s going to change that. He’s going to make the Knicks fun, just like Drake did for the Raptors. He said as much during an interview on ESPN’s First Take

No offense to Stoute, who seems to be a successful businessman, but the idea of comparing himself to Drake is laughable. Drake is a world-famous musician admired by every player in the NBA and a large segment of fans. Stoute is a guy whose résumé (CEO of a marketing firm, founder of a music streaming agency and author of The Tanning of America: How Hip-Hop Created a Culture That Rewrote the Rules of the New Economy) appeals to the suits in charge, not the players or fans. But hey, you have to respect him for convincing James Dolan to pay him a bunch of money for his services. 

Stoute also implied during that interview that the Knicks were going to fire interim head coach Mike Miller, who has gone 13–19 after David Fizdale started off the season 4–18. 

“There had to be a change in [firing team president Steve Mills]. That change will bring a new coach and new coaches that are going to help develop these younger players,” Stoute said. “And they got some young players—you see RJ Barrett, Mitch Robinson. They got something to work with. And getting a coach in there and ultimately getting a coach and a coaching staff that’s going to help develop a team. That’s what I expect to happen so that we can actually get to what you expect from a New York team.

“Having a coach like that who has the magnitude and gravitas so that the media would love to talk to him and believe him, I think that’s super important.”

But the Knicks are doing no such thing! They were forced to release a statement saying Stoute doesn’t know anything about coaching moves. 

Congratulations to the guy charged with improving the Knicks’ public perception on causing a PR disaster on his first day. 

The best of SI

Is 15-year-old Arch the next great Manning quarterback? ... Philippe Coutinho doesn’t regret missing out on Liverpool’s historic run. ... Michael McCann examines the legal merits of Mike Bolsinger’s case against the Astros.

Around the sports world

Alex Rodriguez’s set of golf clubs is truly, truly baffling. ... A football player at the University of Montana allegedly tried to hide from the cops in a dumpster to avoid being caught drinking underage. ... Marwin González is the first former Astros player to apologize for the sign-stealing scandal. ... Carlos Beltrán’s role in the scheme sounds a lot larger than initially believed. ... The Padres are ditching their spring training hats because they were ugly and kind of looked like a swastika. ... The XFL player who went viral for puking on the field explained what happened

Dayton’s Obi Toppin threw down a dunk on his little brother

Hopefully Mets minor leaguers are at least getting real food these days

There’s literally no way for an average high school player to stop this kid

The whole Raptors team is in on the scarf thing now

Close enough

Straight to the point

The Yankees have a Bond villain in their bullpen

This Danish power plant has a ski slope on the roof

Not sports

A Canadian woman who learned to speak English by watching Jeopardy! is going to be on the show. ... A new species of dinosaur was discovered, and it was named the Reaper of Death. ... One of the only two known pairs of Apple sneakers is going up for auction. ... A couple stranded on a cruise ship under coronavirus quarantine ordered a bottle of wine to be delivered by drone. ... A flight from England to Iceland was diverted after an allegedly drunk passenger caused a disturbance that included trying to eat his phone. ... Crews demolishing a bar in Pennsylvania discovered the skeleton of a colonial-era log cabin.

Live TV!

Respect

Samsung just came out with a folding phone

A good song

Email dan.gartland@si.com with any feedback or follow me on Twitter for approximately one half-decent baseball joke per week. Bookmark this page to see previous editions of Hot Clicks and find the newest edition every day. By popular request I’ve made a Spotify playlist of the music featured here. Visit our Extra Mustard page throughout each day for more offbeat sports stories.