In truth, we all hate fantasy football. We don't remember why we started playing, but we do know why we want to stop. Nothing ever seems to go our way.
Like when our starting quarterback posts 42 passing yards, one interception, nine sacks, and one concussion in the first half before leaving the game for good. How beautiful.
Or when our elite receiver fails to record a catch despite perfect health, and allegedly argues with his golden-armed quarterback over hairstyles before he is jettisoned to a team with a 41-year-old QB who is more prone for interceptions than accuracy. How awesome.
How about when our sure-handed tight end injures his knee on the second play of the game while doing what he doesn't get paid to do: making a tackle? Of course.
Fantasy football has also changed the social order of our universe. It has made it perfectly normal to be glued to our smartphones while begging for a field goal from our kicker. It now feels natural to root against our beloved franchises for a few drives if it nets us more fantasy points. I compete against people I have never met who have team names like Your Mom and Touchdown There (okay, I'm actually friends with Your Mom).
Despite all the misfortunes and reclusiveness, we keep torturing ourselves because of the pleasant surprises. We play because sometimes we get lucky with unheralded guys like Kyle Orton (ranked second in passing yards), Arian Foster (first in rushing after four games) and Brandon Lloyd (first in receiving). We play because sometimes our defense shocks the Super Bowl champs by scoring three touchdowns on three turnovers. We play because it's now socially acceptable to high-five a stranger at a bar when our waiver-wire running back gains 100 yards and scores.
So as long as we keep grinding it out in this crazy game, here is some help in deciding on your lineup for the upcoming weeks:
Most owners view Eli Manning like a fantasy backup QB, even though he threw for 4,021 yards and 27 touchdowns last season. He's put together some good performances in '10, finding the end zone eight times (six to Hakeem Nicks), but he also has eight interceptions. With some weak passing defenses on the horizon (Detroit in Week 6 and at Dallas in Week 7), the Giants should let Manning continue to air it out.
If you waited too long to pick up Lloyd, take a look at Tampa Bay's Mike Williams. The 6-foot-2 rookie has been QB Josh Freeman's top target in the end zone this season, scoring in three out of the Bucs' first four games. The Bucs have been average in the passing game but their upcoming schedule looks favorable: St. Louis in in Week 7, at Arizona in Week 8, Carolina in Week 10.
Rookie Tony Moeaki is drawing comparisons to a young Tony Gonzalez, and not just because he plays for the Chiefs. He's fast, he's big, he can block and he can catch. As Matt Cassel's most trustworthy target this season, Moeaki has 16 receptions for 173 yards and two scores in four games. Now is the time to take advantage of Kansas City's upcoming passing schedule: at Houston in Week 6, Jacksonville in Week 7, and Buffalo in Week 8.