Bad 'Boys of Summer: Top 20 Cowboys Training Camp Moments
WHITT'S END 7.28.23:
Whether you’re at the end of your coffee, your day, your week or even your rope, welcome to Whitt’s End …
*America’s Team is about to go camping and, as usual, the rest of the world can’t wait to watch.
There’s a reason why the Dallas Cowboys will make an NFL-leading six prime-time TV appearances this season. And a reason why 18 NFL teams have never been featured on HBO’s Hard Knocks while the Cowboys have already enjoyed three seasons in the spotlight.
They may not have won a Super Bowl in 27.5 years, but they are the unofficial champions of training camp. For better or for worse theirs is always entertaining and, more often than not, news-making.
From Clint Longley’s fists to Michael Irvin’s scissors to Mike McCarthy’s fiery speeches, the lead-up to the Cowboys’ season is riveting, must-see TV.
Buckle up, as we embark on training camp No. 64.
Through the years their preseason homes have also included Forest Grove, Oregon; Delafield, Wisconsin; Northfield, Minnesota; Marquette, Michigan; Thousand Oaks, California; Austin; Wichita Falls, San Antonio and their current residency in Oxnard. No matter the zip code, the ’Boys of Summer have consistently produced as much zany sideshow as football preview.
In the 1960s, head coach Tom Landry barked through a megaphone atop a tower and made his players run five miles up a mountain after two-a-days in pads. In the 1980s, the drama was fueled by competition (Gary Hogeboom vs. Danny White, 1984) and acquisition (Herschel Walker, 1986). In the 1990s, Irvin often intentionally started on-field fights at St. Edward’s University so the defending champs wouldn’t lose their edge.
And through the years training camp has seen its share of holdouts (Tony Dorsett, Emmitt Smith, Ezekiel Elliott), labor strife (1974, 1982 and 1987) and headlines from owner Jerry Jones (1989-2022).
Coming off yet another season of high hopes, regular-season success and playoff failure, the 2023 Cowboys are packing optimism but also a quarter-century of disappointment with them to California. By the time they return to The Star in Frisco in August we’ll know more about this football team, and – as history suggests – a wacky thing or two about their football players.
A year ago they shocked fans and the rest of the NFL by cutting their only two kickers – Jonathan Garibay and Lirim Hajrullahu – and bringing back veteran Brett Maher. But it takes a lot more than that to become a colossal Cowboys’ camp memory.
The 20 most memorable moments from Cowboys’ training camp:
20. QB Competition, 1969 – When Don Meredith surprisingly retired early in camp, the job was suddenly a battle between veteran Craig Morton and a former Navy pilot named Roger Staubach.
19. Asthma Field, 1989 – This would rank much higher, but it was technically minicamp. It previewed Jimmy Johnson’s pre-season iron fist on his team. When free-agent kicker Massimo Manca arrived at Valley Ranch out of shape and blamed his “asthma” on failure to complete conditioning drills, the coach gave his legendary directive while pointing to the parking lot, “the asthma field is over there!”
18. Charlie F-ckaround, 2021 – On the premiere of Hard Knocks, McCarthy gathered his team for a speech that morphed into an unforgettable rallying cry. Said the coach, “F-ck last year. Charlie F-ckaround? He doesn't work here. High School Harry? Get his ass out the f-cking door. This is about winning a world championship. Nothing else. Winning season? Not good enough. Playoffs? Not good enough. Getting to the conference championship game? Not good enough. This is about winning the Super Bowl. Period.” Spoiler alert: McCarthy and his team did not meet his lofty expectations.
17. Switzer vs. Hansen, 1994 – Not too many times has an NFL head coach “playfully” punched a member on the media on live TV, but so it was on a clownish August night with Barry Switzer and former Channel 8 sports anchor Dale Hansen. Switzer accused Hansen of “fabricating stories,” to which Hansen stood by his account of a “power struggle” on the coach’s staff. To punctuate his points, Switzer aggressively slapped Hansen’s left arm three times and outright punched it once. “You don’t know what you’re talking about!” Switzer screamed. Retorted a semi-serious Hansen, “This is starting to hurt a little bit.”
16. Toodles, Too Tall, 1979 – The Cowboys hit Thousand Oaks determined to avenge a heartbreaking loss in Super Bowl XIII, but were immediately blindsided by news of stalwart defensive end Ed “Too Tall” Jones’ retirement. “It is my intention,” Jones said in a stunning statement, “to become heavyweight boxing champion of the world.”
15. TMZ Photos, 2014 – After a week of ominous silence in the wake of photos being released of him canoodling with women not named Gene Jones, Jerry finally addressed the situation by saying he’d been aware of the photos for five years and calling their release an “extortion plot.”
14. Lilly’s Unretirement, 1973 – After grousing about being underpaid to play the grueling sport of football for six months per year, Bob Lilly told the team he was retiring and a press conference was scheduled at 9 a.m. But at 4 a.m., “Mr. Cowboy” had a change of heart and returned to camp.
13. Another Bullet, 1970 – Speedy receiver Bob Hayes held out of camp, telling the team to “pay me or trade me.” Hayes’ demands? $40,000 per year. The Cowboys’ response: They signed Canadian Football League speedster Margene Adkins and branded him “another Bob Hayes” before realizing the original was, in fact, impossible to duplicate.
12. Family Feud, 2012 – After an altercation in which he was arrested by Desoto police for assaulting his mother, Angela, receiver Dez Bryant showed up to camp with his lawyer. “Did a family disagreement occur? Yes,” the attorney said during a press conference. “Did Dez Bryant commit family violence against his mother? No.”
11. Six-Pac(man), 2008 – Head coach Wade Phillips was continually astonished by Pacman Jones’ uncanny ability to catch – and then hold – six punted footballs.
10. No Nnamdi, 2011 – A lockout led to a bizarre training camps in which teams conducted free agency. At a practice in San Antonio’s Alamodome, Jerry and son Stephen interrupted defensive coordinator Rob Ryan’s drill’s to fist-bump him and tell him they’d landed coveted cornerback Nnamdi Asomugha. Minutes later – during a live radio interview conducted by yours truly – news broke of Asomugha signing with the rival Philadelphia Eagles.
*Hot.
*Not.
9. T.O. vs. Tuna, 2006 – Throughout his tenure, Bill Parcells wouldn’t refer to receiver Terrell Owens by his name, instead only calling him “the player.” He also rolled his eyes at camp when Owens’ sore hamstrings relegated him to riding a stationary bike. The receiver poked fun at himself by one day showing up in a Lance Armstrong-replica yellow Tour de France jersey. The coach, as predicted, was not amused.
8. Bad News ’Boys, 1997 – After a camp in which Nate Newton was accused of sexual assault, Erik Williams was served with a paternity suit and Leon Lett was suspended 13 games for failing a drug test, the Cowboys literally burned the house down on their way out of St. Edward’s University in Austin. They left dorm rooms with extensive damage water damage, a busted security camera, kicked-in air vents and a hallway that reportedly smelled of urine. Next summer, camp moved to Wichita Falls.
7. Annulled Divorce, 1971 – Duane Thomas won Rookie of the Year in 1970 and helped lead the Cowboys to Super Bowl VI. By training camp a year later, however, he no-showed and demanded a new contract. General manager Tex Schramm responded by trading him to the New England Patriots, who promptly sent him back and voided the trade when they got a load of his attitude. Disgruntled, Thomas took a vow of silence throughout the season but nonetheless led the NFL with 11 rushing touchdowns.
6. Defiant Dez, 2010 – Though a rookie, Bryant brought a hefty diva attitude to San Antonio and immediately refused to take part in the rookie ritual of carrying veterans’ pads. “I’m not doing it,” Bryant said. “I was drafted to play football, not carry another player’s pads.” Said veteran receiver Roy Williams, “He’ll learn the hard way.”
5. Missing MVP, 1993 – The Cowboys were preparing to defend their Super Bowl XXVII title when Emmitt Smith decided to play hardball. The two-time rushing champ missed all of training camp, threatening to retire, enrolling in classes at the University of Florida and even requesting a trade. His absence dominated camp, and after an 0-2 start without him the Cowboys made him the NFL’s highest-paid running back.
4. Dubious Double-Entendre, 2012 – Lamenting his team’s prolonged lack of success, Jerry kicked off his Oxnard state-of-the-union address by proclaiming “I want me some glory hole!” Cowboys’ public relations czar Rich Dalrymple attempted to explain to the snickering media that Jones was referring to a term used in the oil and gas business. To which Jones deadpanned, “That’s news to me.”
3. Player Cuts, 1998 – Offensive lineman Everett McIver had the audacity to jump in front of Irvin to get a camp haircut and it cost him getting his throat cut. The Cowboys initially described the injury a result of “horseplay.” But when McIver wouldn’t leave the barber’s chair in Wichita Falls, Irvin escalated the altercation and slashed his teammate with a pair of scissors, leaving an 18-stitch wound.
2. Punching His Ticket, 1976 – You don’t tug on Superman’s cape, spit into the wind or, above all else, sucker-punch Captain America. But in Thousand Oaks, disillusioned backup quarterback Clint Longley thought he should be No. 1 over Staubach. During a practice, Longley cussed Drew Pearson for running the wrong route. Staubach calmly informed Longley that, no, it was the quarterback’s mistake for overthrowing the pass. In the locker room that afternoon, Longley sucker-punched Staubach in the face. He was an ex-Cowboy by sundown, traded to the San Diego Chargers.
1. Sayonara, Starter, 2004 – In 2003, quarterback Quincy Carter led the Cowboys to a 10-6 record and a playoff berth. But before Parcells could further elevate his game, his career – and his attendance – evaporated. Carter left Oxnard in the middle of the night, cut by the Cowboys because of a stubborn substance-abuse problem that led to another failed drug test. He was immediately replaced by Vinny Testaverde, and played seven games for the New York Jets that season before ending his football career. The Cowboys also cut their starting quarterback in mid-camp in 2001, but that was for Tony Banks’ inept performance.
*This Weekend? Seeing that I’m hopscotching around Spain and/or France, no Whitt’s End next week. We’ll return you to your regularly scheduled programming Aug. 11. As always, don’t be a stranger.
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