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Reason No. 1,463 not to run on the field

Chiefs safety Harold Jones-Quartey made two tackles last night—one on a Packers player and one on a fan who ran onto the field. 

In the final minutes of the preseason finale at Lambeau, some clown ran out onto the field just as the teams were preparing for a kickoff. According to the Associated Press, the unnamed man “ran about the length of the field.” No one could capture him until Jones-Quartey decided he’d seen enough and brought him down.

You can see in these videos from the stands how Jones-Quartey patiently tracked down the interloper and kept his hips square to execute a perfect form tackle.

Jones-Quartey, who hasn’t played in a regular-season NFL game since 2016, is on the roster bubble for the Chiefs. But if he doesn’t make the squad, he can probably land a job as a security guard in a heartbeat. 

What on earth are you talking about?

All award acceptance speeches should be like the one French soccer legend Eric Cantona gave yesterday after getting an award from UEFA. 

“As flies to wanton boys, we are for the gods. They kill us for their sport. Soon the science will not only be able to slow down the aging of the cells. Soon the science will fix cells to the state. And so we become eternal. Only accidents, crimes, wars will still kill us. But unfortunately, crimes and wars will multiply. I love football. Thank you.”

The rare football walk-off

Second-year Giants quarterback Kyle Lauletta, fighting with Alex Tanney for the right to be New York’s third-stringer, led his team to a comeback victory over the Patriots that was capped off with a perfect touchdown pass on a back-shoulder fade as time expired.

The team celebrated like it was David Tyree’s helmet catch

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Here’s how UNC-Charlotte’s coach celebrated beating Gardner-Webb

Fourth-quarter, preseason finale football at its finest

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Look at the caption

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Not sports

A skeleton discovered under a dance floor in Russia could belong to Napoleon’s favorite general. ... Alex Trebek says he has finished chemo and is ready to start filming the next season of Jeopardy!. ... Stirring corn dog batter with a powerdrill was actually one of the only health code violations at the Minnesota State Fair. ... A sea turtle with two heads was discovered on a South Carolina beach. ... Richard Linklater is going to spend 20 years working on a movie with Beanie Feldstein

I’m on a tight budget so I can only afford watches in the $9,000 range

Everyone who works in tech should be confined to Alcatraz

THAT’S THE CAR

This video is amazing

A good song

Email dan.gartland@simail.com with any feedback or follow me on Twitter for approximately one half-decent baseball joke per week. Bookmark this page to see previous editions of Hot Clicks and find the newest edition every day. By popular request I’ve made a Spotify playlist of the music featured here. Visit our Extra Mustard page throughout each day for more offbeat sports stories.