Seattle Mariners

The M’s kill it every year with these.

By Dan Gartland
March 07, 2019

Nicely done, Mariners

The Mariners have baseball’s longest active postseason drought, and they don’t look like they’re going to break it this year after trading away several key players this winter. But Seattle fans have at least one thing to be happy about. 

Just as they’ve done for the past several years, Mariners players star in a series of delightful commercials. 

The best one is probably this one featuring Seattle’s three lefty starters (or crafty lefties). 

Outfielder Mitch Haniger appears in another where he meets a very clingy fan after diving into the stands. 

Mallex Smith does his best impression of The Flash alongside Kyle Seager. 

Dee Gordon gets a hand from a pit crew after cruising into third. 

And here’s the blooper reel. 

The Mariners might be thoroughly mediocre this year, but at least they seem to have some fun personalities.

LeBron passes Michael Jordan

The Lakers got whooped again, but LeBron passed Michael Jordan for fourth place on the NBA’s all-time scoring list. 

Passing his hero clearly meant a lot to LeBron. 

He also spoke about it after the game. 

Awesome sportsmanship

Manchester United beat Paris Saint-Germain after a controversial replay decision awarded a penalty against Presnel Kimpembe. It was a gut-wrenching loss for PSG and especially so for Kimpembe, who really couldn’t have done much more to keep his arm away from the ball. Props to Romelu Lukaku for consoling him after the final whistle. 

The best of SI

LeBron James passed Michael Jordan, but it wasn’t pretty ... Is LeBron still the best player in the NBA? ... The Sixers and the Bulls had to come back on the court to replay the final possession of their game, but Otto Porter was “midstride” taking a drug test. ... Here’s why Real Madrid fell apart in its stunning loss to Ajax.

Around the sports world

A college basketball team manager with Down syndrome dropped eight points on senior night. ... MLB is planning to overhaul All-Star voting to include an “Election Day” where fans vote on finalists for each spot. ... ESPN is so petty for trying this hard to cut Bill Simmons out of his Adam Silver interview. ... Dan Patrick says an NFL scout told him he thinks Kyler Murray’s height at the combine was “inflated.”

Kudos to Dee Gordon

What, they couldn’t find a guy named Shank?

What a pass by Ovechkin

If you know, you know

Even Canadians eat gluttonous stadium food

That’s three burger patties, three chicken strips, six pieces of bacon, three pieces of cheese and a hot dog. Oh, and the rainbow grilled cheese. 

Playing golf at midnight above the Arctic circle

Not sports

A billionaire diamond trader reportedly died during penis enlargement surgery. ... New York residents are irate that the NYPD towed their cars so the cops could play flag football. ... A man who was arrested for DUI complained that the cop didn’t share a bottle of Fireball he’d confiscated from somebody else. ... Two of the people in the GoFundMe scam that went viral last year pleaded not guilty.

Getting a haircut at one of Yelp’s worst barbers

NYPD confiscated this illegal bike, then the officer crashed it riding back to the precinct

Prayers for Alex Trebek

Making gourmet Reese’s peanut butter cups

A good song

Email dan.gartland@simail.com with any feedback or follow me on Twitter for approximately one half-decent baseball joke per week. Bookmark this page to see previous editions of Hot Clicks and find the newest edition every day. By popular request I’ve made a Spotify playlist of the music featured here. Visit our Extra Mustard page throughout each day for more offbeat sports stories.

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